Judge — March 8, 1924 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

I guess I’ll have to kiss you good-by until to-morrow.” “No, Jack; I couldn’t hold my breath that long.” — New York Mercury. On THE Sora He—Your hair net’s coming off. She (feeling)—Why, no, it isn’t He—You wait and see.—Florida Swamp Angel. | Empty Exercise Prof.—I will have to give you a zero this semester. Stude.—Well that means nothing in my young life-—Carnegie Puppet. PIs What's the use of learning An ancient history date, When I can make a modern one At quarter after eight. —Williams Purple Cow. DILemMa I™ THOROUGHLY puzzled, I frankly admit; But for all of my schemes, There’s no easy way out of it; And the more that I ponder, The more I feel blue, For your lips say “Please don’t!” ‘hile your eyes say “Please do!” And whichever I follow The results may be sad; If I do or I don't I may get “in bad.” And thinking it over And so I am asking For expert advice As to how you would handle A question so nice. If you should be me, And I should be you, “Please don’t!” id “Please do!” —California Pelican. And my lips said While my Mercury Tasiets Petting should be done only on cer- tain days of the w Personally, we prefer Wednesday, Saturday, Thurs- day, Monday, Friday, Sunday and Tuesday.—New York Mercury. Pas “You trumped my ace!” “T know, dear, but it was the only trump I had.” —Virginia Reel CO-ED’S VERSION Be See no evil. Hear no evil. Speak no evil. —California Pelican. “Do you know that joke about crude oil?” “I heard it wasn’t refined; but go ahead _and tell it, anyway.”—Michi- gan Gargoyle. At tHE Zoo Small Young Thing—Oh, what's the matter with that ape? ‘The poor thing. Keeper—He sprained his arm. S. ¥. 7.—Oh, I see; a monkey wrench. —New York Medley. He—I've an idea— She—Notion counter at the rear, sir.—North Carolina Boll Weevil. tte “Having auto trouble, mister?” “No, I’m telling the nuts not to bolt so much.” —Colgate Banter. Rad Gordon—Jim’sh goina Europe. Jin—Shasho. Wha-sa dope? Gordon—He’sh shailin’ on shixsha Deshember. Jin—Sha damfine boat. Wen’ over on ‘er las’ shummer!—Brown Jug. with from W Then And y And f Then Whol And ¢ With What And s “Ye liams comicbooks.com