Judge — September 22, 1923 — page 3: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

©cie5s570% UDGE — WITH WHICH IS COMBINED LESLIE'S WEEKLY “It must be terrible, George, a-having a pianny drop on you like that!” “Ay, Joe, and him allus hatin’ music so!” Drawn by HERMAN PALMER, “Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness” The Return from the Tour “And did you really camp out along the road?” “Yes, my dear, Every day for lunch.” Farmer—Ye may doubt it, but we gut a hundred tun o’ ice offen this here lake last winter. tas Music Edgar Daniel Kramer I HAVE hearkened to the whisper Of the winds amid the tres And my soul has left the s On the wings of symphonies: Thave heard the tramp of armies And the thunder of the mob, But my heart would know the singing Of the kettle on the hob. Rachmaninoff has thrilled me, Bauer and Fritz Kreisler, too, But I ever dream of he Asa place, when life is through, Where white candles will be gleaming, As T trudge home from my job To a room sweet with the singing Of the kettle on the hob. tae Higgs—Well! Well! So you have a new baby girl up to your house! Was that what you wanted? Biggs—No, notatall. Iwanted a boy, but it came while I was at work. nal She (angling)—Don't you think love is a great incentive to success? The Success—Sure. Vd never be where T am to-day if I hadn't had to hump myself to pay three alimony allotments. Market Notes (With Regards to Theodore Williams) by William Sanford 4vRESH farmers eggs opened strong after heavy buying. Breaths went short and noses were driven to cover. Ladies’ silk stockings are at a high level, and there is evidently something interesting on the inside. Apparently, however, there is no desire to break the combination, There seems to be con- siderable interest on the curb when. silk stockings are movin, Faces on sal 1 husbands with expensive wives are reported as going long and their bank accounts short, while the wives buy at top. prices, do much expensive covering and draw interest. while their husbands are work- ing. Lovers report that kiss exchange, and that are) many shady transactions in the moonlight, toe eon the there Main time, Se Senator Fuller Bull—I have, my friend. And, speaking as one who has served his constituency faithfully, at least say so without fear of being g: : speaking, also, from the standpoint of one who has consistently represented the common people—and I challenge my enemies to prove to the contrary; speak- ing as one of the people myself, [am pleased to inform you that it is exactly twenty-three minutes after three. [ thank you! r—Have you the correct Fae They say all a man needs to know to be successful are three wore Yes, no, and why. President Coolidge apparenily has learned to elimin- ate the why. sas The better a fighter is the more likely he is to be scrapped. An Even Split “We'll split the gate receipts,” Said the boxing potentat “My man will take in the receipts And yours will get the gate.” ery We now see many a girl whose brow is like the snowdrift, but frequently there is a little too much drift. tt Visitor—My, how quiet it is! are the boys? Hostess—Oh, they're still at camp. “But T thought they weren't. going this y - “Well, we thought we couldn't afford it, but ten days after school closed. the people next door offered to pay all ex- if we would. only send them for the season.” Rata id you spend the Where penses Suggested slogan for one of our well- known popular magazines: “All the nudes that's fit to print.” comicbooks.com