Judge, 1923-06-23 · page 32 of 36
Judge — June 23, 1923 — page 32: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page collects brief humorous anecdotes from international publications, satirizing early 20th-century social behaviors and class dynamics. **Key jokes:** 1. **Burglar's complaint**: A thief objects to being identified by a witness who hid under bedclothes—absurd logic undermines his credibility. 2. **Motorist's defense**: A driver hits a policeman but claims he thought he was "just a pedestrian"—mocking indifference to authority and reckless driving. 3. **Servant's observation**: A maid reveals her master's late return through his warm boots—sly domestics exposing their employers' secrets. 4. **Political satire**: A senator avoids classical quotations because constituents care only about market prices—critiquing mercenary American politics. 5. **Capitalist aspiration**: A poor man wants to become a capitalist but lacks tools—ironic commentary on class mobility and capitalism's promises. 6. **Author's ears**: Mocking paternal pride by suggesting large ears suit a writer—absurdist physical humor. The page exemplifies Judge's tradition of satirizing vanity, hypocrisy, and social pretension across classes and nations.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Magistrate—Have you anything to say before I pass sentence? Burglar—Yus, m'lud._ It’s a bit thick bein’ identified by a bloke wot kept ’is head under the bedclothes the whole time!—London Opinion. eee Judge—You are charged with running down a policeman. What have you to say for yourself, Motorisi—I didn’t know he was an officer, your honor, I thought he was just a pedestrian.—New York Sun. DIGEST OF THE WORLD'S HUMOR Mistress—What time did your master return last night, Jane? Jane—Don’t know, ma’am; but at ’alf-past six this mornin’ ’is boots was all warm—London Mail. “You no long in your speeche: >,” said ator Sorghum. “People get so in the habit of talking about the cost of things that what my folks are interested in are market quotations.”— Washington Star. se classical quotations “Work? I would like nothing better than some work. But, of course, being a poor man, I haven’t the money to furnish my- self with tools.” “What would you like to be, my poor man?” “A capitalist "—Le Rire (Paris). In the Heart of the White Mountains at Open June 16 JACKSON, N. H, Gray’s Inn Golf, Health and Happiness— \ll Prevail Here EVERY INDOOR AND OUTDOOR SPORT GRAYMORE, 21 Preble St., Portland, Me., Same Management Best Dance Music and Centre of Mountain Life for Young People FRANK M. GRAY, Mgr. Bill—I_ understand he’s had very ex- pansive dealings in Wall Street? Will—No. York Journal. Very — expensive—New Candid Friend—No, I don’t think he will be an artist, but I should say he'd make a magnificent author. Proud Father—By jove, old man! D’ you really think so? “Yes, he’s got grand ears to stick a pen behind!—Passing Show (London). chad “He was nurtured in an incubator and lulled to sleep with a radio lullaby.”— *) Florida Times-Union. th’ day, “I dinna feel verra gran’ Mary. Mix me a guid stiff glass 0” whusky an’ make me tak’ it, whether I want or no!”—London Opinion.