Judge — June 23, 1923 — page 3: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

©cie579529 JUDGE WITH WHICH IS COMBINED LESLIE'S WEEKLY “Life The Bride's Father by Geor, FP uere’s a sentimental feeling When F. Mendelssohn is pealing And the bridal couple hobble up the aisle from side to side. There is such a balan in Gilead Never reached in Homer's Hiad, All the world is full of ha but The Father of the Bride. are fervid exaltations myriad relations; 1 Show of friendly favor and a ow of family pride From both male and female gender As they view the costly splendor ‘That has made a blithering bankrupt of The Father of the Bride. There From There There is none to take exception To the following reception, Wh al feast of welcome the neighboring countryside. There are toasts and hearty wishes And a joyful crash of dishes That brings an indigestion to The Father of the Bride. greets Then when all is haply over And the Newlyweds, in clover, Are nestled in a cottage, there to bliss- You may see a figure shattered, In a suit so badly tatter That you'd scarcely recogniz The Father of the Bride. sae A very small and somewhat bashful high school freshman was telling a fish story. “In the spring the salmon go up the river to. spoon.” He was nearer right than he thought. , Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness” rubbish receptacles distributed through- out the city. English is w York City. The 1 of Brooklyn Bridge is 6,537 feet. If it was any shorter it wouldn't reach river and then Mayor Hylan home, or something. Thousands of men who would think nothing of walking thousands of miles for cigarettes complain thousands of times daily because they live a block or two from the nearest subway station. The orange peels in. the on the numerous stands are genuin Thousands of people enter the Publie Libra’ wrty-second street. every day. Some of them go in to re: ‘or every man who doesn’t smoke there’s a woman or automobile which does. Facts Concerning Our Wonder City by Robert ( male child York ha the official language of . O'Brien N born in the City an equal chance at in the subway. hewspapers are are thousands of LY VERY of New F across the number of would have to swim There ae Mary—Tom, you are an awful sissy. Your mother and father must have been married by a justice of the peace. Tom—Well, judging by the noise coming from your house every night, your mother and father must have been married by the Secretary of War. Read Two Hebrews met on a train and the topic of their conversation was their sons. “Meester Isaacs.” inquired the first. “How did your son Ikey get through his aduation oxamination?” splendid,” exclaimed the ands with delight. ra Va) : hs ih oa plendid, rd, clapping his “He failed in everydi we asked of an by a complete “What is mean honest automobile dealer, hauling?” “Well, in the case of a used car taken in on trade,” answered the honest dealer, “it means turning back the speedometer. ov “Yep, that’s Zeke Hoskins. Pretty smart man, Zeke! Why, sir, he kin shingle a roof, er, caulk a sharpy, er paint a wagon, so ye couldn't tell who done it!” 1