Judge — June 23, 1923 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

on he en gs by STORIES TO TELL JUDGE $10 weekly for the beat tory aub- for the second beat. Original, unpub d. Ad- First Prize BUSINESS associate of Thomas A, tdison had occasion to interview y man who is deaf and rather about it. When they began to f man indicated his infirmity by cupping his hand at his car for a moment, but the caller failed to observe ign and much of his talk was wasted. \ friend who accompanied him tried in vain to impart the idea with a nudge or a whisper, and when they had left he explained the situation. “Well,” said the man from New Jersey, “the only other deaf man I know is Mr. Edison, and when one starts talking to him he ‘Dammit, yell! Pm deef!” talk the di says, Ik A SMALL TOWN in Kentucky the only joyment of the young people is meeting the two trains which pass through every night. Mrs. Smith, an acid-tongued gossip, also met the train and often made rather stron, icisms on the behavior of the younger generation. On one night the crowd at the station were much amused to see the following notice on the bulletin board: ‘Number twenty-three twenty minutes late. Mrs. Smith on time.” ery Tere was a new physician in Kansas City, says John Nicholas Beffel, who had practiced in seven Ohio communities and who claimed to have attended the President's brother-in-law during a siege of speckled pneumonia. He prided him- self on his unerring ¢ nosis of all ills. On a slow day an elderly man with a benevolent-looking beard) hobbled — up two flights of stairs to the medic’s office, and asked for treatment. He had rheu- matism in his right leg, he explained. Having put the patient through a fast five-minute amir ctor nod- ded wisely said: “Sure, T know whi at's the matter with you. It’s ole a “Old age! Not the sick man. “Why, my left leg’s just as old as my right one. If it was old age I'd have rheumatism in both of “em!” social e1 bit of it!” ig at a quiet r, dear,” she said, “that there was a wreck last night a few miles down Wouldn't you like to go out dear,” replied the earnest young man, “the biggest wreck in the world could not tempt me from you!” xn He—Marriage is a great institution! She—Yes, I know there are a lot of inmates, Some Optimist N Trisu construction foreman suffered the loss of a hand by the premature explosion of a blast, and as he holding the bleeding stump the crowded around were profuse in ions of sympathy. Whist, lads,” consoled the one isn’t as bad as it might be pose T had had me pay in me ha tas stood gang their injured Sup- sEGRO was taking dinner at the home of a friend. The dinner consisted chiefly of hash, and on being offered some he refused. The host, not wishing to see his guest go hungry, insisted that he take some. Upon that the negro replied that he never ate hash, not even at home. “Why is that,” asked the host. “Well,” answered the negro, “I never ow what's in y from home be- in it.” eat it at home because I it, and I don’t e LW: cause I doan know w! il Strategy M*: Juones jumped up in bed 4 She switched on the light and shook her husband’s shoulder. “Sh!" she warned. “I hear some one downstairs! A burglar!” Thones jumped from the blankets. “TIL soon deal with him,” he said. And his voice sounded courageous. “Oh, but don’t put those heavy shoes on; he'll hear you!” “IT intend that he think I have any desire gentleman!” T" man at the corner table restaurant had been waiting a long time for the fulfillment of his order, Finally, the waiter approached and said: “Your fish will be coming in a minute should! Do you to meet the in the or two now, sir.” The man looked interested and “Tell me, what ba © you using?”