Judge — June 9, 1923 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The boss shakes a mean bat. now and then an exasperated “Darn this field!” reaches one’s ears. The irritable person is Ira Bazinkus, who insists that if those last’ three grounders hadn't struck stones he'd have made good stops, though from where we sit we can’t see any stones. But Ira is closer to the scene than we are and ought to know. TT! only person on the field who is place on the team is little Willie Ga cus. Willie, who runs er- rands and licks stamps in the main office, is the only member of the house of Pfaffenheimer who can throw a curve and he has the pitcher’s job sewed up. He has a wide roundhouse curve that is very effective in the Key Ring League where it is unknown that by stepping into a curve of this kind and busting it on the nose before the full break comes, it can be knocked for a row of barber Willie is in heaven as he warms up, with an impressive windup, before an audience of the office force who order him around during working hours. As Willie continues to impress his audience a fami limousine pulls up. Mr. Pfaffenheimer’s car!—and the chief in it! Excitement. And awed whispers. Mr. Pfaffenheimer alights. Coach Burke greets him. “It certainly is good of you to come around and watch us,” s the perspiring coach. a right,” replies Mr. Pfaffenheimer with a deprecating gesture, “I like to be one of the boys.” “This will spur us on to greater efforts,” chimes in Assistant Coach Bloop. “Don’t mention it,” responds Mr. Pfaffenheimer, “it’s a trifle. And now hand me a bat. Td like to hit a couple.” More excite- sure of poles. ment! The Big Chief is going to play! “Willie,” Mr. Burke commands the office - boy - pitcher, “go in there and throw a few to Mr. Pfaffenheimer.” Then in a whisper, “Let him hit it.” Willie, ruminat- ing, moves toward the pitcher’s box. Why let the boss hit it? “If I let him hit it,” he muses, “he'll think I’m a bum pitcher.” Willie grips the ball for a roundhouse curve and grimly winds up. The ball goes zipping on its way and breaks, with a sweeping curve, over the out- side corner of the plate. Mr. Pfaffen- heimer misses it by two feet. Mr. Burke glowers. Willie winds up again. Another curve and the — bo: misses g Mr. Burke waves frantically to Willie. Willie ignores him. He throws a third roundhouse curve and _ strikes the boss out. Mr. Burke nearly has a stroke. “Well done, young man,” says Mr. Pfaffenheimer to Willie, but what he is thinking is, “I'd like to wring that fresh kid's neck. Willie had better not ask for a raise. Snapshot of the office boy actually at work, te To a Flirt by R. PF. Hamill I KNow the smiles you cast at me So lavishly; Those sudden tender glances, meant To fill me with a vast content, You give as free To all the rest, from here to Kankakee. I know you never could be true To less than two. But, Phyllis, though I'd fain confess My sorrow at your faithlessness, What can I do? Just this, by Heck! you! I'll tie the can to The cashier shows how Hornsby did it. 15 comicbooks.com