Judge — August 26, 1922 — page 29: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Summer Resort Policeman—Come on now, Lady Godiva, you can’t walk | through the streets in that condition! Dumb-bells hy Willie Nolan {DUMBBELL hangs out in gym- nasiums. Dumb-bells are of three nders—male, female and neuter. Male | dumb-bells hang in the vestibules of he r the ticket col gymnasiums, waiti lector to turn his sneak inside and engage in a hip shaki set-to with the female of the species, 1 female having found out that the ticket to the Haberdashers’ Hall, presented to | her by the office . to hear the famous Kelley Band, wa ame, The common dumb-bell is the one the instructor makes the corpulent: business man push away from him and then pull back, at the rate of five dollars per hour. The male is really the damber-bell. He snares the money for which the jeweler These the exchanges the hoop and rock male presents to the female to bind an agreement to support him for life. ‘This reement is commonly called marti, ag which, by the way, is not an agreement at all. ‘The female is the dumbest-bell, hecause she believes the brass hoop. is really made from the same stuff from which Unele Sam manufactures his half eagles. She also believes that the bit. of bottle bottom stuck in the hoop is the material that made the Kohinoor famous. same The neuter dumb-bell has not the faculty of speech. Both the male and female have, but while they talk a great deal they say nothing. The male and female believe all they read in the funny and their conversation is like this : ie, have you ever been in the Occident?” “No, Honeybunch, but to tell the truth, I've had several miraculous es- capes.” Then in the small hours of the morn- while Lochinvar is contemplating dragging a sock down to the pile of hay in his furnished room, and she plans to net the Government one sweet amount.” rr “Tye a notion to quit. The director says I must jump off a precipice in the morning.” “Oh, t “T dunno about that. say he wouldn’t need me any more.” it’s just a fake fall. | I overheard him The 16 Hour Shave is the Perfect Shave s F YOUR shave is going to last for all the waking day, it’s got to be a close and clean one, and smooth as well. The lather that merely works upon your beard won't get you that. When the lather of Williams’ Shaving Cream has thoroughly softened each hair until there remains only a minimum of resistance to the razor’s edge, it has done only half the job. Your skin must be prepared. Don’t forget that. It must be made flexible and supple. It must yield gently and evenly as the razor passes. There is no stiffness, no leathery “feel,” left in the face that has been well treated with Williams’ lather. Prepare both beard and skin with the lather of Williams’ Shaving Cream. Then your razor will cut close without irritation. Then you will have your 16 hour shave. A Trial Tube FREE Atrial size tube will teach you a lot. Just say “Shaving Cream” on a postal card and we will send you one at once; or use the coupon, give the name plates in her vestibule a shoulder shine, his Sweetie pipes ou @ @ 9 “Honey, wota you know about syntax?” | That's where Honey's intimate knowledge | of political economy and finance crops out, and he cracks back: “Well, Sweetie, | if they ever put that over, it ought to] Cream' TRIAL SIZE FREE nbury HE J. B.WILLIAMSC JSTONBURY,CONN.| 34 Actual Size c anew luxury comicbooks.com