Judge — February 18, 1922 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

IS A COLLEGE EDUCATION NECESSARY? Since the ebullient spirits of youth have driven the college boys to dispossessing every trap drummer from his traps, the question is: Has every drummer got to go to college? College Bootlectures and Bootlaboratory ? By Perez Simmons HERE is an insistent demand for the addition to the curriculums of our colleges and universities of a new series of courses. The knowledge necessary for success even in some of the newer branches of trade is very ex- tensive. Our institutions of learning are awake to the fact that graduates must be fitted to take positions of leadership in the enlarging arena of our national business life, and recent readjustments in business make neces- sary the inclusion in 1922 college cata- logues of courses practically as fol- lows: Bootlegging 1. An introductory course, open to all students. The lectures include: The history of intoxicants in the United States from early days of untrammeled production, through the second phase of internal revenue and local option to the present Reformation; the biography of Carrie Na- tion, the fall of free lunch, the rise of soft drinks in consumption and price, the significance of unexpected prosperity in the present- day individual. Considera- ble required reading. Mo- tion pictures will be shown of several busy wharves in the Bermudas. Two lectures per week. sidered comprise: The philosophy of personal liberty, the ethics of confisca- tion, the influences which reduce en- forcement appropriations, malleability of police, prudent advertising, markets and delivery, distribution points and agents, the psychology of thirsty sena- tors, the physician as a factor of com- petition, daily habits of warehouse watchmen; extracts, blood tonics and hair removers. Prerequisite: Bootleg- ging 1. Three lectures per week. 3. Juniors and Seniors. A thorough course in the technique of bootlegging. Deals in a practical way with: The fundamentals of distillation (with a discussion of the relative merits of rural and urban locations), coloring materials, fractional stratifications, re- coil, fermentation, treatment of de- natured raw materials, neutralization of manufacturing odors, aging (of 2. Sophomores, Juniors Drawn by GaspNen O REA and Seniors. A_ general course, designed to follow “There, John, what do you think of my new dress?” “Without exception, the funniest thing I Course 1. The subjects con- Brevity is the soul of wit” 12 labels), uses of the siphon tube, pre- scription writing, camouflage of ship- menio, manipulation of license plates, alteration of bonded warehouse paper, label printing and signature work. Prerequisites: penmanship, engraving, chemistry, bacteriology, bootlegging 1 and 2. Two lectures, three laboratory periods per week. Advanced. A course designed for the serious, more mature student. Seniors only. Deals with specific marketing problems, such as the needs of the diplomatic corps, the Chicago Constabulary, and the more important gatherings of former service men. In- ternational commerce and the larger aspects of transportation and bulk storage are adequately presented. There is research in such advanced questions as: Budget systems for dis- tribution of tithes, the development of a market news service, card- index records of the veloci- ties of customs service launches, geography, navi- gation and gun-pointing. Prerequisites: Bootlegging 1, 2 and 3. Students elect- ing this course are expected to do considerable field work. The University will furnish cash bail in deserv- ing cases. Hours by arrangement: Professor Smythe, Asso- ciate Professor Smyth, As- sistant Professor Smithe, Mr. Smith. THE SITUATION “What ails your baby?” “He seems to have be- have ever seen! come an early victim to the general unrest.”