Judge — January 21, 1922 — page 34: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Reading from left to right—Fust Fes, Wim. Farnum and Herbert Brenon. You may not have Farnum’s histrionic abil- ities, but you will act the same when you read 20 Cents Don’t Wear a Truss Brooks’ Appliance, the modernscientific invention,the wonderful new discovery that relieves rupture, will be sent| ontrial. NOobnoxious springs} or pads. Brooks’ Rupture Appliance Has automatic Air Cushions, Binds and draws the broken i parts together 8 ‘as you would a broken limb, salves. No lies. Durable, cheap. Sent on trial to prove it. Protected by U. S. patents, Catalog and measure blanks mailed free. Send name and address today. Brooks Appliance Co., 409D State St., Marshall, Mich. Gangway By Kate B. Burton SHE is ravishing in breeches, Her permanent wave is perfection. She wrote the book on driving a car, And plays advanced auction. Her damns are delicate. Expertly flicking her cigarette ash, Insouciant and intriguing, She pets and is petted. Pouf! Moralists—Miss 1922. COURT RULING “Your honor, I beg to file this suit in forma pauperis, without payment of costs.” “How do I know your pauper? Has he paid you?” “He has.” “Then I suppose he is now a pauper. Let the case be filed.” a Prceting 3 Book FREE pias expert wrestler. Learn at heme by mall, thy. Handle Farmer Burns, Tiss mates tes ‘Omaha, Neb. lient is a | “From the Desert” By Gwendolen Cumnor OWADAYS it is a curse To try to think your thoughts in verse. For every word suggests a rhyme That’s wedded to a better time. For instance, when you write of cheer You seem to follow it with Beer; And when you tell folks things are dandy— Confound it! Brandy! You must think of Each time you pen a vagrant line Your instincts jingle on to Wine; And when a subject you must choose The word itself smacks strong of Booze! ‘Tis vain to sing of sun and rain, Subconsciously you write Champagne. And what though Volstead makes it risky— You still are free to think of Whisky! And when your thoughts begin to spin, Alas! they come full stop to Gin! But as your courage seems to fail You somehow brace it up with Ale; Then Absinth, Vermuth, Rum and Rye, Alack! they lead you but to Dry. You may be fitter, richer, wiser— But, oh! you want an Appetizer! The Lexicon of a Boy By Edmund J. Kiefer F/NOuGH: Three helpings of every- thing on the table, with the privi- lege of more. Work: That which you are told to do when the gang is outside waiting. Play: Important business which school is forever interrupting. Schoolroom—A place where you are expected to sit still and behave at the same time. Measles: Luck. Sweetheart: The only person of your acquaintance to whom you would be willing to give more than the core of an apple. Grown-ups: People who can stay up as long as they like. Dog: A friend who understands. Dirt: Something grown-ups are al- ways claiming to notice on your face and hands. Tonsils: Things you would like to take out of the doctor who took them out of you. Mother: The place to go to when you're hurt. TIME IS MONEY “Skinnum has cleaned up a fortune in two years.” “Tl bet he didn’t get it very clean in that length of time.” Willie’s Got "Em!