Judge — November 5, 1921 — page 32: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Buy Your Xmas Gifts Now nly a few cents a da No Money | Down Just send, yourname And address for our 128 | ‘Christmas book of Bateains in, diamonds, fi watches and jewelry. Millions of dollars worth | of jewelry from which to ghoose your Xmas gifts. Your selection sent on a penn 4] 1£ you don’t thi the biggest Sew cents a day. 8%Yeasly Dividends Write Today for Xmas Catalog Send your name and ad- | Beautiful ‘Xmas catale, Serta eh Bests Ey fizr.so | Steparesscotestin cd Jone 5 ee ede oe cet BS [’MLYON & CO, 1 Maiden Lane, New York N Arms and the Dan Possession is nine points of the law. The only thing that keeps Cupid from laughing in his sleeve is the fact that he hasn’t any. An Old Print It is quite possible to read a woman like a book, especially if she be of the bold-face type. i For Coughs and Colds Safe and Sane PISOS This syrup is different from all others Pleasant —gives quick relief Contains no opiates—good for young and old. 35¢ per bottle everywhere The Third Eye (Continued from page 8) Jesse was a gentleman, and never interfered with the regular process of man’s reposeful hours. He did his work in broad daylight in railroad train and stage coaches when the passengers were merry with wine and meat and were liberally disposed. Jesse was a psychologist as well as a gentleman. The vulgarity of the times is no- where more in evidence than in the methods of our ungentlemanly and unpsychological hotel raiders. Oh, for the good old days of Jesse James and Robin Hood, when a crook was a man for a’ that! FH AVE you ever stood in Bald-Head Alley in the sculpture depart- ment of a museum and pondered on the drama of the hair-cut? There is a satiric glint in the eyes of Socrates, Homer and Alexander as they look down at our ringlets, our overdue Pompadour or our unshaven cheek. We are always between a barbers’ strike and a dollar haircut. Their nude knobs are a veritable Utopia to us. Then to heap coals on our tolstois and walt whitmans, which we have resolved to let grow, we pick up a paper with an ad, staring us in the face which reads, “Balm for Bald- heads.” Who wants balm for baldheads in these days? Who has any use for hair restoratives? They are cun- ningly designed schemes to keep us poor. With barber-shop prices what they are we want to get rid of our hair forever. A woman’s crown of glory is her hair. It is a man’s crown of sorrow. With what fear and trepidation we peep in the mirror each morning to see how many hairs have budded during the night! We mark off the days on the calendar to the next hair- cut like a prisoner in the death-house tolling off his hours to execution. A woman’s tragedy is her wrinkles. A man’s is his topknot. Hair, its he Only Book of its kind in the world! ALO STUDIES— the Art Edition De Luxe, by Albert Arthur Allen, are photographie creations of the nude, blending the purity and charm of youth amid luxuri- ant settings of nature, ‘Thirty-two full page, wonder fully clear, large sized reproduc- 00 tions, art paper in — gold, postpaid ALLEN Art Stupios 4106 Broadway, Oakland, Cal, U.S.A, cause and cure, is now the foremost question of the hour among the sterner sex. Scientists are engaged in trying to get at the root of the matter. What causes hair? Inflammation of the thought-atoms in the brain, as everybody knows. In ages of great ignorance men automatically became bald. In times of great intellection, like these, the oom pauls reach flood- tide. We had hoped that the sudden de- aleoholization of the public would produce an epidemic of baldness, for it is a well-known fact that malt and spirits produce the cursed pigment. But the hair it groweth every day! Let us pray to the great god Balder! The Linguist “What did you think of the play, old man?” “Oh, it was possibly plausible, and plausibly possible.” Not the Hand but the Handle “John, why do you object to our daughter marrying a title?” “It isn’t the title I object to, it’s the thing that goes with it.” Drawn by Pexcy Crospy. “The moving finger writes, and having writ—moves on.” 30 ee WH, Di Ne Th Tk comicbooks.com