Judge — July 2, 1921 — page 28: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Now, Grapys Is A RIPPING GIRL; IN FACT, SHE TOLD ME SO; SHE’s BRILLIANT, AND SHE IS $0 GooD— For wuat I po not know. —Pennsyloania Punch Bowl. Rondeau LONG to be in dreamland, where I might my lady’s visions share Within her fancy’s castle gay, For sweetest whimsies skip and play About her rich Elysian lair. She’s lovely as the fairest fay, So be the castle gay or grey I must admit that it is there I long to be. She’s beautiful; divinely fair; Her dreams are void of earthly care— So, Princess, harken while I pray, And do not frown if I should say, King of your castle in the air I long to be. —Yale Record. Goes ’Way Back Ange—Who wrote that ditty, “There’s Only One Girl in the World for Me?” Alex—Adam, _ probably.— Vanderbilt Jade. Danger She—I don’t think you love me any more; you never fuss over me. He—Tut, tut! I had one with your mother over you this morning.—Chicago Phoenix. Courtesy “T beg your pardon,” said the con- vict, as the governor passed his cell. —Virginia Reel. Selfish “Your husband is mighty good to you.” “What do you mean?” “Why, I’ve heard he has bought a washing-machine for you.” “Not for me; he’s heard that it’s a good thing to make beer in.”—Caro- lina Tar Baby. One Reason Shopkeeper—Why don’t you write me a check for the amount that you owe me? Debtor—Ah, that would be against my principle—Cornell Widow. A Thirsty Chap Tailor (measuring coat for customer) —How about pockets, sir? “Quart size, please.” —Orange Peel. "Goodnight, Bill” ‘THAT LOW DOWN FEELING, WHEN YOU SEE ONE OF THEM THAT YOU SHOULD HAVE DANCED wits But pipn’t.—Warhington Dirge. 28 “Do You THINK A GrRL SHOULD LEARN TO LOVE BEFORE TWENTY-ONE?” “No, INDEED, THAT’S TOO BIG AN AUDIENCE.” —Brown Jug. Sharp Eyes Frat—We have a new dish-washer at the-house. Frater—How so? “T noticed the difference in the finger- prints on my plate.”—Penn State Froth. Whozat? I’ve heard of Byron, Shelly, Keats, Of Kipling, Tennyson, But one thing’s always worried me Who is this bird, Anon? —Texas Scalper. It Is a Wise Landlady Visitor—Does Mr. Crawford, a student, live here? Landlady—Well, Mr. Crawford lives here, but I thought he was a night watch- man.—Toronto Goblin. Internal Evidence Lowbrow—This book has been written since January. Highbrow—How so? “In chapter one it says ‘Cuthbert gave a dry cackle.’”—Stanford Chaparral. A Slow One “What would you say, dear, if I put my arm around you?” asked the inexperi- enced youth. “At last!” responded the lady fair. —Missouri Showme. WITH THE COLLEGE WITSI]IB Drawn OYSTE! latter Detroi