Judge — July 2, 1921 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Drawn by W. 0. Wusox-+A. C. Tue Averace Man, AS HE SEEMS TO WIFEY ON SUNDAY MORNING. Any Family, Nowadays By Cuarues Haxson Towne ISTER has a complex— Movies drive her mad! Mother can’t bear motoring; Neither can poor Dad. Everybody’s studying Everybody’s brain; Where we once had privacy, Everything is plain! Psycho-analyzing Morning, noon and night— “Everybody’s queer” now, Nobody is right. Aunt Em shuts a window- Ah! the mind is racked For the hidden meaning In that simple act! Uncle dreamt of murder, Therefore he must be Something for the Freudian. To give the Third Degree. Bobbie hates a_hair-cut, Sticking out his tongue. Take the boy to Germany To see old Dr. Jung. Spooning in the parlor? My! how out of date! They are half-demented— “Strange,” at any rate. What’s the world arriving at, What’s the subtle twist In the brain that falls in love? Ask some analyst! Probing all together, For each other’s faults, No one dares to one-step, Fox-trot, dip, or waltz. For, if you are normal, You’re abnormal! Oo! I'm afraid of Freud, I fear,— That’s a complex, too! When His Love Grew Cold She—Someone told me you were fond of dogs. He—Yes, I love ’em. She—Where are your kennels located? He—Eh? She—Where do you keep your dogs? He—Oh, in the icec-hest. I only buy half a pound at a time. Parliamentary “T make a motion,” shouted the tum- bling sea as the giant ocean liner rolled majestically by. There was a sputter of foam astern. “And I second it,” roared the propeller. The Loop-Hole By Henry FisHer UPron arriving at his office, Mr. Enni- case, the prominent attorney, broke into a spasm of laughter when he dis- covered that a member or members of the Midnight Marauders Burglar Union had relieved him of one perfectly new type- writer which he had recently purchased on the instalment plan. “This surely is a hot one!” he laughed as he picked up the telephone receiver. “Give me Main 4448, please.” .. . “Hello! is this the Paymore Typewriter Co.? Well, you people certainly are out of luck! Someone entered my office last night and stole your machine.” “You mean ‘your machine,’ Mr. Enni- case,” came back the astounded voice over the wire upon identifying the caller. “Why, you made the initial payment last week.” “Quite true,” explained the shrewd lawyer, “but your contract which I have in my possession states that the machine remains the property of the Paymore Type- writer Co., until fully paid for. Therefore, in sympathy for your loss, I shall not ask that you return my initial payment. Good- bye!” Why the Tiger Is Blind De Style—They say that druggist is kept busy all day filling prescriptions. Gunbusta—Yes; the business he does staggers one. Hubby Pays! Mrs. North—What’s your advice for a happy wedded life? Mrs. West—Dress well, and give your husband the credit. TOIL ii\ GH i\\ \ \ mat | YY i She—Goovness, WHAT CRACKED? YOUR FOUNTAIN PEN? —“N-no, My RBs!” 12 ies ee es ta aaa ae