Judge — June 11, 1921 — page 27: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Triangular Theory By Sornir E WE were talking glibly of the quantum theory, the relation of electricity to matter—though we don't quite know what’s the matter—the foundations of thermodynamics, atomic structure, and special relativity Yes, we had been voyaging on strange seas of thought, and coming down to earth, made a few terrestrial Reprorp observations. \ straight line is an abomination to They avoid it by curves and zigzags. They spurious idealism. We the Chinese. suffer from a suffer from a We are mathe matical in our poses. When we gather to gossip we fall into geometrical figures If two men are smoking silently in the street, they trisect it. The arrival of a third man converts the situation into an equilateral triangle. Ourarchitecture is austere. Even our curves seem to be made up of little straight lines. Look out of your window, The fire escapes are triangular. The neighbor hood ¢ unity house, with windows fullof milk bottles and geranium pots, offers a succession of triangles. The beautiful with their graceful curves are marked off in leaded sections cidedly triangular. This feature of ¢ cathedrals is minor, compared with the spires, veritable mazes of triangular in genuity All of which offers food for re fection, spurious materialism stained-glass w a ce Drawen by W.K. Stanwere + A.A The Girl—L ALWAYS TAKE AN HO KS WALK BETWEEN FIVE AND SIX face OT re Drawn by Vaoxe Ryoew nears end)—Isn'T ir wonpER THAT THEY'VE She (as play PUL TO THINK UTHER SO LONG? He—YVes, isx'tir? Tur NEARLY THREE HOURS. Now arithmetic says a triangle is a figure bounded by thre says it is composed of three figures bound- ed by one side. The wrong side. Religion has tried to redeem the triangle and sc made it the emblem of a great organization Thus the Red Triangle, the Y. M. C. A emblem, is bounded by two sides—inside In other words the right sides. Society it or outside it 4c, side or the wrong side. If it’s right to be in, it must be wrong to be out From a musical standpoint the triangle is a harmless sort of instrument bounded onall sides by the trap drummer. The society triangle is usually an acute angle triang! ingularly enough it is co-related to the Smart Set, though it invades the ranks from all classes. easier to find the area of aright angle triangle. ‘The rule is easier toremember, The society triangle hav ing no right angle involves complications It is, however, in determining the area Take for instance, the triangle A BC \ marries C and is henceforth known as AC. But C you see, will not let B be, and while one and one may be one divided by one, there are, after all, three. This gives us the “Eternal Triangle.” Viewing this triangle at any angle, one LOVED EACH SHOW HAS LASTED. wonders where Euclid comes in. Given the base and the hypotenuse to find the other side. No—given the base and the height to find the hypotenuse, I think it is the hypotenuse that is usually scarce in the Eternal Triangle, square the base and height, add her and extract the square root Pry this rule on the Eternal Triangle and you land in jail, in the morgue, or an asylum Arithmetical triangle problems are worked with chalk and a blackboard. The Eternal Triangle involves a walk and a blackguard. And the problem is never solved, though the courts have a good try atit. The society triangle is never on the square—on the level it isn’t. NOTHING LIKE A BREATH OF FRESH GASOLINE BEFORE DINNEY