Judge — May 14, 1921 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Picnic Hotutpay Papa’s y Terrie Love the way home Papa Pe duncle’s joy threatened to overflow and flood the car. He wanted to offer the conductor two fares. His were bright that he could see a homely woman standing, and his heart mellow that he smilingly begged her to take his seat. “Every dog has his day,” Papa jubilated, taking out his latch-k “and tomorrow i mine—Father’s Day. Heretofore the longest lane turned, eventu- ally, into an auto pike; even the worm rolled over and became a butterfly; but father continued to be the muffled drum of the family band. For the first time since he became the non-voting stockholder in the matrimonial corporation, he'd sit at the head of the director’S table and cast the deciding vote in case of a tic. Whoop la!” Thank my stars,"” murmured Papa, after dinner, as he opened the book which Jones had recommended as a corker, “T can sit up as late as I like, tonight.” On the stroke of nine Daughter Daisy took possession of the book. ‘You must get a good rest tonight,”’ she cooed, tenderly emphasizing the last word “But I want to finish my book,”’ P: eyes. so is The President ¢ Fa MINK gust Cets'err. WHERE A »a pleaded. ‘The bears think they've got the hero down to his last cent; and he’s get- ting ready to spring a deal that will shake the foundations of the stock exchange—if he gets by with it.” “Now, pa,” Mamma warned, “you know that if you don’t get your full allowance of sleep, you'll be cross.”’ After more to the same effect, he submitted, consoling himself with the thought—/omorrow! 8 ee “Aw, lemme complained Papa, not- ing through half-closed eyelids that the clock marked 7.30. “Isn't this Father’s Day?” “Certainly,”assented Mamma, in her firm- est tones. ‘And you must get up and enjoy it.” What else she said is immaterial. Papa got up, spilling en route to the bathroom several words that should never be used by a man with a nice wife and a lov innocent daughter. Returning from the kitchen, to make sure that he hadn’t relapsed and taken to his bed again, Mamma de- manded: “Why are you “lone,” Drawn by W.0, Wasox + A. “It’s A KIND OF FACIAL WHEN MY WIFE Drawn by Joux Herp, Ja. + Geonce Mireur. the Eccentric Brotherhood of American erhood—Lut’s CALL A CONFERENCE, MY BOY, TO DETER- FATHER Paratysis, Doc, From DESCRIBES THE FILM COMEDIES SHE'S BEEN TO.” 7 ing on those disreputable old put clothes? “T want to be comfortable And,” Papa added, striving to give the speech a defiant ring, ‘after breakfast Jonesy and 1 are going over to the vacant lot and pitch horseshoes.” Daisy came running, attracted by Mamma’s horrified — gasp “Why, Papa,” she chided, ‘Dr. Goodleigh is to preach a special sermon on ‘The Noble Fathers of Our Land.’” One noble father groaned aloud. Yet, of such stuff are fathers made, that at ten o'clock Papa, slowly cooking in silk hat, frock coat and tight shoes, was on his way to church, At each billiard hall and bowling alley Papa cast a wistful glance. But Me the rapier-tongued guard on ither side chilled hope of escape. “May [ take a nap?” sarcastically asked Papa, after dinner. Mamma and Daisy exchanged glances signifying: ‘Isn't he hopeless? “No, dear,” GeTS ON AND WHERE tiently responded Mamma. “In your honor, we've invited a few friends for this afternoon. And Herr Beerkowski is to favor us with some Wagnerian selections.” “Gotterdammerung!”’ Papa shouted; that—or something like it—and fle Long after the guests had gone Papa was found in the furnace room, peacefully sleeping on a pile of hard coal. Simple Curiosity the sweet young thing suddenly gasped. me?” the unprogres- “Oh, Charlie!” “What would mother say if she saw you kissin, “But—er—I’m not kissing you, you know! sive fellow stammered in startled astonishment “No,” the fair maid- en reluctantly ad- mitted, “you're not but I was just wonder- ing what she'd say if she were to see you.” Anybody Know? I see the retiring cabinet officers bought the chairs they used to sit in at cabinet mect- ings.”” “Wonder if the Sec- retary of the Navy bought an old battle ship to take home?” Thoroughly Tested Borrowell—That fel low Flubdub is too strong to work. Harduppe—What makes you think so? Borrowell—'ve_ tried PoLiTe ; to work him. TRYING TO BE comicbooks.com