Judge, 1921-02-26 · page 12 of 32
Judge — February 26, 1921 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Analysis of "Measuring the Cosmic Mind with a Yardstick" This satirical article by Caspar Harvey mocks attempts by great thinkers (Plato, Savonarola, Darwin, Bergson, Billy Sunday, Edison, and President Wilson) to understand human nature through abstract philosophy and science. Harvey's central joke: **humanity's vocabulary reveals our true priorities**. His statistical table "proves" that humans obsess over war (1,000 words) far more than peace (162 words), and care more about marriage (289 words) than celibacy (28). By treating dictionary word-counts as scientific data—measuring the "cosmic mind" with a "yardstick"—he ridicules pseudo-scientific attempts to quantify human nature. The accompanying cartoons and captions provide domestic humor about socializing and romantic interests, reinforcing the theme that people's actual concerns (appearances, romance, social climbing) differ vastly from what philosophers claim motivates us. The satire targets both grandiose intellectual pretension and human nature itself—we're simpler and more conflicted than we admit.
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busier than Coelebs. Consequently there are 289 words concerning marriage to every 28 about celibacy. The ratio of words measures the cosmic mind as accur- ately as the loop-worm did the cabbage- leaf in the Garden of Eden, and as faith- fully as the metric system serves trade and science today. The following table is the yardstick of the cosmic mind. The ratios are based on a standard of a thousand words for war: War, 1,000 Uselessness, 22¢ Pain, 954 Intention, 2 Falseness, 923 Uncertain’ Death, 842 Destruction, Pride& Vanity,767 Drunkenness, 2 Poverty, 184 Clothes, Fatigue, 128 Disapprobation, Wit, t10 ' Honesty, 06 , iy SU | k \ 5 debts, 47 GMA dW AK intl y Nhe, Drwen by Buvaxt Farex - A.C, Failure, 447 Pleasure, 609 Mrs. Van Do you know ner? Belief, 424 Truthfulness, 125 Mrs, De Silke—Just weit eXovcn To cUT HER Wisdom, 406 Life, 8 Swiftness, 378 Humility and Mod- Measuring the Cosmic Mind with a Adversity, 356 esty, Yardstick Knowledge, 327 J ess, r 3 8 i Reason, 638 Insanity, 318 Friendship, 305 Safe: Answering, 43 HILOSOPHERS, priests, scientists, and lawgivers have cauty Nakedness, 62 P been baffled in their attempts to understand mankind. ¥ , 278 Weakness, 2 \pprobation, 300 As Plato, Savonarola, Dar- win and Justinian failed, so will Bergson, Billy Sunday, Edison and President Wilson. But the race goes right on understanding itself, or it would not be increas- ing continually its vocabulary to express itself. When man gets an idea he invents a word for it. If he does not have the word, he never had the idea. The mother-tongue, unit by unit, is the cosmic mind of the race. The dictionary has half a mil n words. For every thousand words connected with the ideas of war there are only 162 words that answer for peace and the ideas of peace. Man has more words about war than he has about peace, because thus far he By Casran Harvey SAS has possessed more ideas about war. The words in the diction ary are in direct proportion to the distribution of — man’s thoughts and emotions. The allotment of words folloWS pysey by ttaunros Wastes the formation of the concepts — 7, made by the human faculties “Wat Cupid and eugenics have been “For Lixixc so aucit THe Kiss JACK THRUSTER MADE ME TAKE IN THE PARK THIS MORNING.” trienne—Ou, I's so rurtous wrrit sysetr!