Judge — December 25, 1920 — page 29: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

December 25, 1920 Judge’s Model Primer for Little Intellects EGYPTIAN DEITIES “The Utmost in Cigarettes’ Plain End or Cork Tip Old- shioned and ase 7 | oI FOP People of culture and Ao Parte tenn scnothe Racmapeocinn : refinement invariably Brace ty AS Ponven é PREFER Deities HIS isan Au-to. It be-longs to Ned’s Pas Ned is ta-king a Ride. How much \ bo any other cigarette ON, N.Y pa. did the Au-to Cost? We do not know Be other cause it is not Paid for. Ned is Play-ing in the : v what Back Seat with the Chat-tel Mort-gage. The nonths Mort-gage will Live long-er than the Au-to \ Maargyics irre ipacaices a0F of his The Auto is ver-y Thirsty. It drinks 15 er how Gal-lons of Gas-o-line e-ver-y day of it’s Lif Ned can now have Bread and Milk three times a ed ox day. Is he not Luck-y? If you are Good may-be your Pa-pa will Buy an Au-to some-day so you can ha Mort to Play with - = Then you can have Bread and Milk too. In-laws with outlaw self-assertion After the Battle ‘ oe And sundry male and female cousins “Great guns of iron!” ejaculated a neighbor. Christmas Gifts and the (Just here my verse is quite Gilbertian!) “What's the matter, Gap? You look like you'd Silver Lining he which I reckon by the dozens met a bear Each for some frippery is pining. “Aw, I sorter forgot my sense a spell ago, By Eowagn W. Bakxaxn They are the cloud pre-Yule days bring, and told my fourteen children there wasn’t any Dad, bless him! is the silver lining Santa Claus,” replied Gap Johnson, of Rumpus OR mother furs. She's set on sables * . k ; . He says he doesn’t want a thing Ridge, To keep her warm when she goes shopping. They must be finer than Aunt Mabel’s Which are—this worsens matters!—topping. Nor is this all! She wants a necklace That once impoverished a king Oh, mother certainly is reckless!— But father doesn’t want a thing. For Ethel books, but not the light kind, The love-and-laughter-without-stint kind. No! Her penchant’s the dull and trite kind, The rara avis, out-of-print, kind. She scorns the best best-sellers fiction, Contemns what modern lyrists sing: At Christmas Ethel’s an affliction But father doesn’t want a thing The needs of Phil are philatelic ‘Till he acquires the newest issues: s, all of them!—the word angelic Will not describe the boy in his shoes. is abbess of unreason, nts a jump-rope and a swing; / \ \ | To overlook the help were treason— : : aos oe tennted But father doesn’t want a thing. Daneinc, Turn anon Now | Will He Come Again? By Evcene C. Dotson “Oh, Johnny, you mustn’t do that! Go away! Leave Mr. Brown’s hat you found it, Where Tsay! Won't damage it any? Oh, I know, but he, Ina very few minutes will want it,” said she.