Judge — December 11, 1920 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Tits Pree Love stcrr L THOUGHT Was Fine Bur now | xxow 1's nit; Wuew rain CLARisse sTers OUT To DINE It’s Me THAT PAYS THE BIL rrell Widow Fini la Guerre T was indeed a dear romance, She was a nurse and he a lieut When Cupid did the bandaging, And threw an arrow in to boot Bien, came peace and wedding-bells, But war came soon thereafter— For every franc he made she seemed To spend a louis faster. She told him on the transport home, | “A full purse is love’s token,” 1 And that is why I really feel They parted in Hoboken It was forsooth a dear romance, The dearest ever seen, oh! It had its start in Lyons, France, And ended up in Reno. -ennsyloania Punch Bowl. f The Result i) Ethel—1 suppose Jack has at least acquired some polish by: this time. May—He should have. Since prohibition he’s been drinking nothing but liquid vencer Irrepressible, Joyous, Following Directions A GIRL was walking along a road, and a young man_ along her. The roads finally united, the man and woman reaching the junction at the same time, walked on from there together. The man was carrying a large iron kettle on his back. In one hand he held, by the legs. a live chicken, in the other a cane, and he was leading a goat. Just as they were coming to a deep ravine the girl said to. the young man “I'm afraid to go through that ravine with you, it is a lonely place and you might over kiss me by force “How can I possibly kiss you by force.” he asked, “when I have this iron kettle on my back and a cane in one hand and a live chicken in the other, and am leading this goat? I might as well be tied hand and foot! “True,” replied the girl. “but if you should stick vour cane into the ground and tie the goat to it, and turn the kettle upside down and put the chicken under it, then you might wickedly kiss me in spite of my resistance!” “T should never have thought of that,” he said. And when he came to the ravine, he stuck his cane into the ground and tied the goat to it and. lowering the kettle from his shoulders, im- prisoned the fowl under it, and kissed the girl! Carolina Tar Baby power me Poor Prunella Wildly he dashed into the bare, drab apart- ment—and stopped aghast! Everything was in confusion! A grimy castoff kimona hung over the back of a rickety ch. he shrieked! sounded from the kitchen! “My God!” he raved! “Glub Glub!” from the culinary department! In a mad frenzy he dashed across the poverty- stricken room and grasped the handle of the door! Tt was locked! * Prune sink!—Cal 1 was taking a bath in the kitchen ifornia Pelican. Viewpoints Cynic—Just saw another movie with an un- happy ending! Jolly—Hero lose the girl? Cynic—Naw; married her.—Ohio Sun Dial. 4 decem JUDGE LEGE WITS IN Irresponsible Ye Guilelesse Barde WISTE he was a Guilelesse Barde, Fore cke to plese hys spouse He wrought a bitte of pocsie All day within ye house He fetched ye sereede untoe ye dame, when she oped She dealt hyr lord a buffettinge, Whereat hys blue bludde flowed r ode, Ye lynes were prettye lynes vnough And thatte whyche caused ve stryfe Was butte ve tytle that he chussed “Ye Barde to hys first wyfe Columbia Jester r Same Here Kid—How dare you!! No!!! 1 never kissed a man in my life Kidder—Aw, don’t get so stuck up about it. I never did cither.—Carnegie Puppet. hand: perie Reaction Colla They say that the price of paper is still way On up so they'll probably go back to making shoes Ne out of leather now.—Michigan Gargoyle ee the | insuf nani hurbs circu isual 1 vealt the | A Pres rox tHe Orex-Dook Poticy —Yale Record.