Judge — October 30, 1920 — page 30: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

TO GAT | i Regulate your stomach so you can eat favorite foods without fear of Indigestion Flatulence Gases Acidity Palpitation ; A few tablets of Pape’e Diapepsin correct acidity, thus regulating diges- tion and giving almost instant stom- ach relief. Large 60¢c case—drugstores. Dives Trifles By Rew Lawpent | LIKE to hear | Trifles about The Great Affairs of state are mere Affairs of state, And pale before the views Of diplomats On shoes Or such things as cravats. Joes | The world may hail A virtuoso’s skill— I ponder how he'd rail If crossed in will The world may sing A savant’s high degree— I'm wondering Just how he takes his tea? ROMEIKE’S 5S CLiPprinc BUREAU We will send you all newspaper clippings which may appear about you. your friends. or any sub- fect on which you may want to be “up-to-date.” Every news. per or periodical of importance in the United States and urope 1s searched. Terms $7.50 for 100 clippings. HENRY ROMEIKE, 106-110 Seventh Ave., New York | The Awful Ordeal By Joux H. McNeety HE tremendous moment had arrived. Carolyn pushed back several locks of recalcitrant hair as she rang the door- bell. She was very nervous. How she dreaded this interview! For nights she had stayed awake repeating co herself the probable text of conversation. She must dis- play tact and diplomacy. She must inject wit into the words that flowed from her tongue. She must have a clever answer for every quest ion For days, too, she had stood in front of the mirror rehearsing the sweet and enchanting smile that was to envelop her lips as she pre- sented herself. She had practiced the dignified manner in which she was to stride across the drawing room. She had drilled herself to perfection into all those little nice- ties of etiquette, even to the way she was to hold her hands grace- fully in her lap as she sunk into a chair. She had neglected noth ing to create a delectable impres sion Yet now that she was face to face with the ordeal she was visibly agitated. She was actually trem- bling. She must collect herself. There was really no excuse for yielding to her feelings. After all her careful preparation in antici- pation for any contingency there was no reason why she should not conduct herself with conspicuous refinement and culture. Not the slightest possibility of failure ex isted Of course, her hostess would begin by drag- ging out those chubby baby pictures of him and she would have to go into ecstasies of delight over them. But she was ready for this emer gency, too. She was calmer now. A servant answered the door and ushered her inside. Carolyn was making her first call on her fiancé’s mother. Right-O! Editor—(assigning work to reporter)—Go out to Dr. Wright's funeral and write up his last rites right away Reporter—All right Jack the Housebuilder Takes Up Home- brewing This is the house that Jack built, It lacked concrete foundation; That's why they couldn’t find Jack’s house After three days’ fermentation. Not a Complaint “She told me that I might kiss her on the forehead,” complained the ardent lover. “I like her cheek!” In Bad “Yes, I cast my hat into the political ring.” “How'd you make out?” “Poorly. Didn't even get back my hat.” 30 JUDGE Don’t Wear Appliance, the modern, scientific invention, the wonderful new discovery that relieves rupture, will be sent on al. No obnoxious springs or pad: eros MR.C.& BROOKS s ; . Brooks’ Rupture Appliance Has automatic Air Cushions. Binds and draws the broken parts together as you would a broken limb. No salves. No lies. Durable, cheap. Sent on trial to prove it. Protected by U. S. patents, Catalog a measure blanks mailed free, Send mame and address todav. BROOKS APPLIANCE CO., 409 State St., Marshall, Mich. Drown by Pact Remy Crop Rerorts— | “1 Want a Drink” HERE are a lot of folks in these Uni States who will sympathize with this cunning youngster’s desire for a drink. This dimpled infant reminding Mama that tit’s bottle time expresses an emotion not un- common in these days It would be hard to resist the appeal of thi picture, one of the many noted covers that h appeared on JUDGE, “The Happy Medium Reproduced in full colors, mounted on a double mat. ready for framing. this appealing picture is yours for cents, postage prep: JUDGE ART PRINT DEPARTMENT 225 Filth Avenue New York City