Judge, 1920-08-28 · page 5 of 36
Judge — August 28, 1920 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Analysis This page presents the opening of a serialized fiction story titled "A, E, I, O, U or The Mysterious Letters" by Gelett Burgess, published in Judge magazine. The illustration shows a well-dressed man in a top hat sitting on a donkey—a visual gag emphasizing absurdity or foolishness. The story itself concerns "Ferret," an albino detective involved in financial crimes and mysterious anonymous letters. The narrative appears to be a mystery-comedy hybrid, typical of Judge's satirical fiction format of the era. The humor relies on wordplay (the mysterious vowel-titled letters), physical comedy (the donkey illustration), and the melodramatic tone of period mystery stories. Without additional historical context, the specific satirical targets remain unclear, though it likely mocks contemporary detective fiction conventions.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Fifty A, E, I, O, U or The Mysterious Letters A Story Based on Documents Recently Discovered in the 1 tr Bu By G RI Ferret's Financial M inusness ERRET, the Albinodetective, was sitting on a keg of assorted fingernail clippings from the Merry Mani- cures (Limited). They are melted up with molasses and made into tortoise shell spectacles, you know—or didn’t you? Anyway, you must know how risky it is to melt manicures, But Ferret's mind was thinking of his first love, bred Albino. Heaven knows it’s those possessing real erret’s first love, however, had smelled so strongly of ripe money that he could never quite forget. He wi till alive. She always had a new- laid 5 for him, and often a 10. Well, he must drum up business. He was as far out of work as a corkscrew-maker, and his landlord was having daily conver- sations with him, through the keyhole. And the world was full of $$$! Yet how rare are trillionaires in August! It was days before Ferret caught one and when he did the man had nothing what- ever to be detected, except a rather hootchy breath. He said, however, that he would keep Ferret in mind, in case any- thing particularly venomous turned up, ingly elsewhere. He was ifficult thing for a thorough- eldom attempted even by a Author of “Are You a Bromide?” “Goops and How to Be Them," Jew York State Insane Asylum “ Ain't Angie Awfull” and “The Great Yellowish Mystery.” For another week Ferret lived on chewing-gum, and then he was summoned to the presence of Mr. Mazumoid. CHAPTER 2 Mrs, Mazumoid’s Mystery announced the bankocrat, “has during the chon pale, “ M Y wife, last week received several anonytied letters pistache paper.” The Albinodetective commi inch smile, and said nothing. he knew how to say in Portuguese, and any other language, at such a time would have seemed inadequate. My wife, as I often call her,” Mr. Mazumoid proceeded, in her portly way, annoyed. I will give you $1,000 if you will discover the inventor of the outrage and get an explanotion from him.” And he sighed like a man from Kansas catching his first sight of a New York hotel menu Ferret's ears fairly trembled as he looked skilfully at the first letter: ted a one-and-thre hths- tt was the only thing in fact “Dearie Pearl; Your maid tells me that your second best corset is somewhat worn, Why not get a new Adiposylph which are made even large enough for you? Jambo.” comichooks.conn