Judge — August 21, 1920 — page 33: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

August 21, 1920 TONIGHT TO'MORROW ALRIGHT LAXATIVE for 30 years ads Godiva By Ricuarp Butter Graenzer NO auburn, black, nor blonde your hair, But everyday, commonplace brown; Yet many a queen would be glad to wear Tresses so royal, tresses so rare, In place of her golden crown. It fits your head like a coronet, And serves as a veil for your eyes; It baffles the mesh of the finest net: Who's seen it fall, can never forget The length of it if he tries. If this were only Coventry, And you were Leofric’s wife, You could ride Broadway more modestly ‘Than Miss Georgette and set us free From taxes and such for life. Not So Slow “Young man,” questioned the stern pro- fessor, “have you ever heard the word ‘procras- tination ’?” “Yes, sir.” “Well, where have you heard it?” “Just now, sir.” WALL-NUTS By James Montgomery Flagg This clever picture, in full colors, 11x14, mounted on a heavy | | | mat, ready for the | frame, sent prepaid for twenty-five cents, Judge Art Print 225 Fifth Avenue New York City y Skin Troubles onsen. attests es \\ 4 INNS Sy Pp Drawn by Pact Renty Back to Ear Tommie’s Crust Teacher—Tommie, you have written, “Our minister is very picous on Sundays.” Now, passing over the fact that ‘‘picous” is mis- spelled, how is the minister on week days? Tommie—Oh, I guess the minister cats pies on weekdays, too. For Shame by Texxyson J. Dert A primrose by the river’s brim A yellow primrose was to him; The same, the unappreciative cuss, As 'tis to all the rest of us. 3 SORMERLY KNOWN AS CHECONA EVANS ALE THE ONLY DIFFERENCE IS ONE OF ALCOHOL—REMEMBER THAT IM ALL OTHER ESSENTIALS IT Is THE SAME GOOD OLD EVANS Yourskin can be pe quickly cle cleared of Pimples, Blackheads, Acne ‘on the face or body, | Enlarged Pores, Olly or Shiny Skin by s new treatzoeat pa wlearaToney |RAISINS—CURRANTS Imported Greek. Spanish—Excellent quality. $0-Ib. box $12.00 prepaid EUROPEAN SUPPLY, Importers Box 12 Uptown _Pittaburgh, Pa, The Rebuilt Ford by Katurrine Necury R. CLARENCE FORD was a close stu- dent and his eyes began to trouble him, so he went to an optician and was fitted with glasses. Shortly afterward he had trouble with his cars and went to an ear specialist for relie He had an attack of dyspepsia and it was months before he was himself again. He just recovered from his dyspepsia when he had appendicitis and had to have an opera- tion. Then he had rheumatism in his left knee and went to a mineral springs resort for several months. Just after he returned home, it was necessary for him to go to the dentist and the chiropodist every week. Mr. Ford was now practically a yet he still suffered. He had only one hope and that was that the jst famous over the whole continent rebuilt Ford, You are perfectly sound,” was the diagno- sis, “except that all matter is made up of elec- trons and these electrons revolve in a circular orbit. Your whole trouble was caused by some emotional excitement which made the said electrons revolve so fast they became inter- locked and thus caused the pain.”” “He is a crank,” muttered Mr. himself. Ford to But of course we all know a Ford has to be cranked.