Judge — June 12, 1920 — page 33: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WEATHER bheards this month. Che Hallphoo Bugle [xes= A NEWSPAPER with a HUNCH VOLUME 1 BALLYHOO, JUNE 12, 1920 RICH RANCH OWNER MURDERED Beaten to Death by Older Brother in a Heated Argument Over Business Affairs Feud Had Long Existed Between Two Men—Fratricide Arrested and Makes Confession By Kenpatt Banninc Basytonta, June 12—(Special Corre- spondence to The Bugle.)—One of the most brutal murders in the history of this section of the country was committed yesterday afternoon when Abel, a well-to-do middle- aged farmer and owner of a large sheep ranch, was beaten to death on his estate by his older brother Cain. His skull was frac- tured and he suffered severe contusions of the face. The condition of the body indi- cated that a violent struggle had taken place before the fatal blow was delivered. The murderer, who has been taken into custody, at first claimed to have no knowl- edge of the crime and denied responsibility for his brother’s movements, but under the close questioning of the coroner’s jury he broke down and made a full: confession. Cain and Abel are the only children of Adam and Eve, both of this place. The motive of the crime is believed to be jealousy. Both the alleged murderer and his victim have been residents of this district all their lives and are well and favorably known. Cain is a prosperous farmer and owns one of the best tracts of land in the neighbor- hood. It is reported that the bad feeling that has existed between the two men originated some time ago with a remark attributed to their grandfather, concerning the relative value of their farm produce and which was regarded by Cain as a reflection upon his methods. The recent increase in the mar- ket for wool and lamb and the consequent prosperity of Abel is believed to have preyed upon Cain’s mind until he killed his younger brother in a momentary burst of anger. It is considered likely that he will enter a plea of insanity. Neither of the brothers was married. Garpven oF Eben, June-12—Adam and Eve, parents of the Babylonian fratricide Cain and of his victim, Abel, are former residents of this place, but since their departure some years ago all trace of them has been lost. The records indicate that they were evicted for disorderly conduct shortly be- fore the birth of their older son, Cain, and there is no recollection that either of them has visited the place since. Prior to their departure they Pore a good reputation. But little is known of their antecedents. Egg View Notes Miss Phrony Edgin no longer has a scorny finger for Galileo Sprawl. because Galileo sent her such a nice ink- written letter about herself that she has read it ragged. Truman Bilge, who bought a mail-order family-size bottle of tonic last week, notices that the ad. is still in the paper. Button Edgin, who is about to accept a position in a Pollywog bank, has been posting up on future legal holidays, so he will have something to look forward to. Sherm Spoor says that daylight is the only thing he has been able to save since he got married. Bill Waite, our grocer, has installed an up-to-date gum machine which works every once in a while. Dow Ludlum got into a Pullman coach by mistake recently, and he hasn’t been able to read with his shoes on ever since. Sizz, Boom! Ah! The first annual Intercollegiate Ha-Ha Handicap, con- ducted by our progressive contemporary, Judge, drew Punch Bowl a third. Of the fifty-odd entries, Cornell's Widow proved to draw the most smiles, and, logically enough, the silver loving cup. Pausing to dip deep with the silver spoon of congratulation, we of the Bow! take this epportunity to ladle out two cups that cheer: one to the Widow, bless her natty little heart! and the other fizzing with admiration and appreciation for that generous old pateman, Judge! Here's to both of 'em!—Penasylrania "Une CAMA 89 Mr, Q. Ote Gimber of Mud Center, who is studying a book on "manners and practised yesterday by holding his hand over his mouth while he yawned in the presence of his wife. NUMBER 4 Personal Mention Fos, Lincoln has used over a million dollars’ worth of diamonds and jewelry and things in his portraits of swell society people in Jupcr. Gelett Burgess, the w. k. sleuth, has trailed a lot of villains to their doom. Ferret, the Albino Deteckative, is awful jealous of Burge. Tom P. Morgan et supper with old Gap John- son of Rumpus Ridge, Ark., the other night. Gap says Tom is a tolerable good literary feller and knows what he is talking about. Lenso, who writes up the movies for JupcE, says there’s a heap of money being spent for new pitcher shows, but still they don’t seem to get so’ very far away from cowboys and Nick Carter. A. Machefert, who is modest about his front name, is thinking about becoming a cubist one of these days when the price of cubical pictures goes up. Ellis Parker Butler is back in his home town of Flushing, L. I. He has been vacationing in California, but is back in the bank where he holds a nice job. Ellis writes his stories., etc., after the whistle blows and the real work of the day is done. He also has twins. Steve Leacock is doing talking stunts around the country. He makes ’em laugh by saying fool things in a perfectly serious way and using his arms like a stump speaker. A pleasant visitor to JupGE was Peter McAr- thur, editorial writer for the Toronto Globe. Pete is doing a big book on international relations and one that will make an awful sensation when it is published, he says. Walt Mason is bunzalowing at La Jolla, Cal., indefinitely. “Uncle Walt” says he is tired of the Kansas climate, and is going to give Cal. a fair trial. A lot of us are tired of our own climates, but we aren’t as lucky—or as clever—as Walt, who is at present embowered in roses at a point where he can heave a rock right into the Pacific. Crowning the Jackobean Jack-o’ wishes to congratulate Albert R. Stewart '20, until recently King of the Jackobites, upon his success in capturing the cup offered for the best individual piece ot writing submitted to J udge’s College Wits Contest. If ever ‘a graceful bow of parting were made, our ex-Potentate ha, made it.—Dartmouth J ack-o'-Lantern.