Judge — May 22, 1920 — page 33: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

UDCE me oth May 22, 1920 beats you to it with a yell of itemized triumph He takes a piece of paper about five and a half inches wide and cleven fect long and starts in thus: Conference at office, Mr. D. 2.50 Letters to J. Groesbeck Attending Municipal court Preparing contract J. & K Conference Mrs. D, at home Postage Courtplaster Telephone from Mr. K Looking at the moon Luncheon with plaintiff Vink feather for plaintiff lelephones to plaintiff Vhinking over case Insult from opposing counsel in reality, hadn't shaved for four days and had half the pinfeathers of his right wing ripped off in a fight, and looked as if he had hocked his halo to buy a box of Pittsburg stogies. Just suppose you had to do that, and then the next fay stand for the affectionate grief of the forty- four-year-old pansy who had been eating Spanish onions and wanted to get a divorce from her husband so she could marry the moving picture actor who boarded in the front parlor and who borrowed all the money she had pinched out of the housekeeping. How much respect do you suppose you would have for humanity at the end of the fifth year? Law rhymes with war and you know what war is. New Style Wre. and Wr. Ann Elizabeth Littlefettow. Dr “Tuere! Vex-Room House, Piano, Victrois to Persons Ixcoxvententiy Sirvatep, put Wisiinc to Estreetain. But why pursue the items further? Lf you have ever had one you know the above is a true bill, and if you haven't had one, may keaven deny you the exquisite agony When you consider the lawyer dispassionately, he is doing as well as could be expected. Maybe some of us wouldn’t do as well. Suppose vc had to consort daily with crime and violence and hatred and malice and all uncharitableness, to say nothing of wealth and immorality and the desperate certainty that half your clients ought to be serving eleven concurrent terms in cight different jails. Vet you have to smile in court and lay your hand on the shoulder of a whited sepulchre and paint a picture for the jury of an angel who, 1 Tus Tris Av, Wirt Herr Pay Our Expenses! Hiarpwoop Froors, Use or Krrcuen, Exc. Fox Rent, Evexixcs, Ov To Slow Mu: “Who are those two men hanging around the harem?” inquired the sultan, “T understand that one is a former beau of your latest favorite and the other seems to be playing second fiddle to him,” replied the chief eunuch, “Hum,” mused his majesty well, just see the captain of the guard and tell him to hang up the fiddle and the beau.” Assuredly Not “Why doesn’t your husband take a day off now and then?” “He works in the weather bur can’t do without weather.” People 33 | Two Million Motor Cars Will Not Be Enough MILLION persons who want a A car will be disappointed this year! Any car with four wheels and a hood can be sold. Consequently, some of the million buyers who think then “lucky” may be sadly disillusion after an experience of a few n with their new c. Don’t buy just “any” the Motor Department of Lrstie’s Weexty help you with its expert, unbiased advice, free of char Your car must represent a wise investment as well as a reliable vehicle of trans- portation, Fill out the following coupon in detail and mail to LESLIE’S WEEKLY 225 Fifth Avenue. New York, Y. COUPON Haroip W. Stausox, MLE. 1 Departn Lestte’s WEEKLY 225 Fifth Avenue New York City Manager, \ car to cost about $ and am especially interested in one of the make) : (type) My requirements for a car are as fe lows: Capacity Type of body self feur ‘ould be I have Driven and cared for by ¢ following makes: The follc the type in cchich I am interested are handled by ing cars of approximately dealers in my territory: Please advise me suited to my requirements, as to the car best Name Address