Judge — May 8, 1920 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

j ' fleet 8 ETHER By SS es PS = aimee rE eee See A Rhythmical Beat Pedigreed— Lady—-Is this a jeuli greed dog? Dealer—Vedigreed! Why, ‘f that dorg ovcither of could talk he wouldn't spea York World. Fido's Dinner—Mr What is that disagreeable odor coming from the kitchen? Mrs. Styles some bones for dear little Fide. Styles Why, the cook is grilling Yonkers Statesman. Explained—Bacon—They say « mer ul man fs merciful to his beast rt—Of course. ‘That's right Then you are not a merciful man.” Why not?” ‘Cause T saw you kick your dog kf today.” Oh, that wasn't my dog I kicked That was my wife’s.""— Yonkers t mun Dignifying Scraps Mrs And that is your pet dog? Mrs. Wyles—Yes. Isn't he a darling? “And you give him scraps from the table, | suppose Indeed, I do not, ‘The precious «lear gets noscraps. He gets the remnants.” Yonkers Statesman Styles True Boast at it ‘Der Brummer (Bertin *Jorkins was boasting of his pedigree the other day, and [don't believe he has one in his family. “Oh, yes, he has prize dog.” Bualtin, It belo Umer, sto his The Main Object Vir on a sea voyage tomorrow.” Are you going because you want to get a view of reconstructed I iB No; 1am going because get a drink.” —Bal, re America Horrified for a Moment— At @ very convivial dinner a man with a naturally solemn face arose. gl hand, to pro- pose at measured tones, “drink any more of this stuff: He paused, and there was a horrified severitl seconids—"' than is good London Tit-Bits silence fc for ust Weighing the Question Any ma laria around here?” inquired the stranger, I dunno.” answered Uncle Bill Bot tletop, very cautiously, “Did you come prepared with icine for any: special 1 Appropriate“ 1 sce where a number of wealthy Americans sojourning in Cuba have formed a club’ What de they ll their organiza. “The “Tank Corps -Birmi Ngo Herald chan \ Noble Dowry- “So Freddie is en gaged to that homely Dystiller girl, eh? What's he marrying her for, her money?" “Ssh! When prohibition came in oli man Dystiller was left with three million gallons on his hands that she'll inherit some day."—The Home Sector Some Buyers—"Now there is a ct to ask Congress to put a milli dollar tax on a quart of whisky, w would effectually prevent its sale.” “Well, L don't know, There is plenty of money in this country. And, judging irom present prices cheerfully paid, there might be a few sales.” Louisville Courier- Journal, Most Considerate—°'The captain of ir ship proved to aghtful man.” “How so?” As soon as we crossed the three-mile limit, after leaving port he ordered the ship’s siren blown to let everybody on board know it was safe to take a drink.” — Birmingham Age- Herald comicbooks.com