Judge, 1920-05-08 · page 10 of 36
Judge — May 8, 1920 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# "The Way with Women" - Judge Magazine Satire This page contains two humorous pieces satirizing gender relations in early 20th-century America. **"The Way with Women"** (left) presents a tall tale by "Gap Johnson" from Arkansas. When he casually mentions reading that attractive women in Turkey fetch $1.30, his wife interprets this as an insult to her looks. She responds by hurling a skillet at his head, then a pan of hot water, forcing the entire household to flee. The joke: women are volatile and irrational when their appearance is questioned. Johnson ultimately "settles it" by submitting—admitting women don't need good looks to be worth $1.30. The satire mocks both male insensitivity and female domestic violence as inevitable marital reality. **"Fair Ladies"** (right) is a mock-heroic poem comparing prehistoric creatures' devotion to their mates with human courtship. Dinosaurs, cave bears, and early humans all scramble to serve or impress their females. The joke: male subservience to females is ancient and universal, appearing comical when extended to primitive beasts. Both pieces use exaggeration to mock contemporary gender dynamics and male complaint about female power in domestic settings.
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an, YOu are trying for fear ; you will be late for scl 2 i “You bet bam. It 1 , iz The Way with Women H he Ry ‘You PL Mokoas : HAT was com off at your place last night , Gap?” asked an acquaintance. “As 1 rid 4 past, along in the shank of the evening, I ' heered a right lively hooraw going on in the house, and it then the front door booled open and out you poured 1 along with a mess of kids and varmints, something like ha! the water used to pour down at What-d’ye-call-it, in the Third Reader.” Aw, I'll tell you,” returned Gap Johnson, of Rumpus Rid Ark. “Me and wife was setting there, all ca’m and contented in the midst of the dogs and children, when she happened to mention that she'd seed in the iis, paper where it said good-looking women were fetching nes $1.30 apiece in Turkey. I says, ‘Well, [ reckon a woman - is worth $1.30 of any man’s money,’ says I. ‘That is, if ae she’s right good looking.’ And she rotched something off'm the stove—a skillet, I reckon it was—and smacked me on the head with it, and I was staggering about, trying to find whur I was at and sorter tromping on such of the d and children as were scattered around, she grabbed up a stew-pan of hot water, and let me have it that is, what of it didn’t scatter and splash on the dogs and young ’uns and we all ejaculated out of there as agile as possible. Of course, later I had to settle it the eIpame queue sms best IT could; 1 owned up that a woman didn’t have to be > thunderin, how wive: em and a yood looking to be worth $1.30. You that-a-way; you've got to give in to it they're right, whether they are or not.” In Tune with the Past “What have you to offer Well, sir, I think I can discord to which ny daughter: upport her in the same domestic been accustomed.” she has ee i eno eer Fair Ladies Ry Russene MeCartiy TERED and boomed the ichthyoswurus ashing a hillock to dust in delight “We'll scatter the mountains like pebbles before us,” He said to his queen in the gathering light. With tail like a porker and eyes like a rabbit And trunk like a pillar that’s turned to a worm, The mastodon shied at a mouse (‘twas his habit!) And mousey shied too at the mild pachyderm The singing at dawn of the weird dinoswurus Was broken with shricks for the mate of his dreams While she, mod And raised hi st lady, soon joined in the chorus a note with her jovial screams. The cave-bear went forth for a two-legged runner To bring to his love for her preakfasting bite; ‘The proud ploosapemappidge wont was to shun her, Mave love to his mistress from morning to night. And even the two-legged runner, the eave-man, Went out a mammoth to cook for his lunch: He knew of a woman who'd make him a slave-man, And somehow, that morning, he'd gotten a hunch. For see, it was far in the days before Adam, And April was wine in the jubilant air, And every grim beast at the feet of his madam | Made oath in the spring that his lady was fair comicbooks.com