Judge — March 6, 1920 — page 28: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

o/| MWS © men U of Broadwey:_ ‘REPUBLIC acne A. H. WOODS PRESENTS The Sign on the Door ELTING Prone 8 Mats FLORENCE MOORE in “Breakfast in Bed’ “COHAN & HARRIS THEATRE = West 42d Street Eves, 8:10, Mats..Wed. & Sat, 2:10 COHAN & HARRIS Pre THEATRE, gznd St THEATRE. 42nd St., west of Broadway THE ACQUITTAL A New Play ! ‘HAPPY DAYS | MATINEE HIPPODROME EVERY DAY tHe HAPPY PRICES. Seats 5 weeks abend FOR EVERY ONE! His Disbelief “My brother,” solemnly began the horse faced stranger at the door, who intended to circumlocute around to the point of introducing a valuable literary work, ‘do you believe in infant damnation?” “Nope!” replied Gap Johnson, of Rumpus Ridge, Ark. “What’s the use of cussing a kid before he’s old enough to understand what you say?” " Copy this Sketch and let me see what you can do withit. Many newspaper artists earning $30.00 to $125.000r more per week were trained by my course ot per- eonal ind 1 lessons by mail PICTURE CHARTS make original drawing easy to learn. Send sketch of Uncle Sam with 6c in stamps for sample Picture Chart essful students, of their work and evidence of what YOU can accomplish. Please state your age. “Che Landon School CARTOONING and ILLUSTRATING Cleveland, Ohio Evenings 8:30, Mats. Wed. & Sat. at 2:30 | College Wits Irrepre sstble : Jovons, Irresponsible Consoled in his arms and snuggled her head a rush of emotion surged tenderly he caressed her and She lay ugainst his neck through her she closed her eves in delight “Poor kitty. Did 1 step on your tail?” The Point of View 1uth—She told me she slapped him because he tried to kiss her good- night Helen —He told me she slapped him because he didn’t try.— Colum- bia Jester. Going Some Wim ple — How he treat his fiancée? Simple —Wocks his watch and frat pin and calls up the old clothes California Pel- does man ican. where in spatticle T, wot’: gettin’ dar so doggone earl Nationality Again Prof.— Are you a Latin scholar? Frosh— No, Utish.—Columbia Jester The Girl Question Ruth because she has @ piano new music which I enjoy play 1 call on with lots of ing. I call on Emily because her father tells me funny stories. T call on Henrietta because Lam kept warm— by the glow of her hearth. I call on Evelyn because I like the brand of cigarettes her brother smokes. I call on Flora because I like to hear her dad and mother argue. I call on Mary be cause she always asks me to stay for dinner I call on Lillian be- cause I love daven- ports But the girl — she need to have a piano, a hearth, a davenport, or even a mother and fa- ther, as long as plays papa to me and comforts me while T am longing for my old girl back home. Penns yl- vania Punch Bowl. I'm looking for doesn’t she The Weak End Soph—Vll match you for an ice cream sundae. Fresh—Ml right. wait pais till then.—Carolina Tur denly dise Baby. the langua: fter all cider belt She who has been flunking French, sud- scovers that there may be something in Yale Record. Mental Duds bird who orders apple pie in the hard —Penn State Froth. The Accommodating Can you drive a car with one hand? He—No, but L can stop.— Carolina Tar Baby Want of Tact He—Did you read my poem last night? She—I began it He — Interrupted, suppose. She No. Orange Peel. Syracuse Unalarmed The soph turned back the clock! Hickory Dock! The freshie rose late, Andit was his sad fate To miss eight v'clock! Nebraska Dickory! his Columbia Je Awguun Doesn't It Get Your Angora? Oh, doesn’t it just tickle you When you have not a nickel you Can borrow, beg or snare— Don’t you grit your tecth and swear When your own inamorata Chirps of some guy, this cantata, In her vi sweet as a ‘cello: “Oh, he's just the swellest felaw— His dad's a millionaire?” Don’t you feel unnecessary When you're riding with your fairy On the lewly D. UL R Don't you get awful jar? Don’t you get a spasm When, with wild enthu siasm, She exclaims in accents mellow: “Oh, he’s Gust the swell- est fellow— He’s got the Swellest car!” Detroit Varsity News. an A Love Song Campus Sylph, thee yet, In thy coat of leather- ette; Baby eyes of fishy blue, Secking whom they next ay do. Make hay while the sun shines, Pet, Little Qucen in leather- ette! —IMllinois Siren, Isce comicbooks.com