Judge — March 6, 1920 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Mi Why, Deli Laundress—Oh! Mu went down the wast Pay as You Please By Fowarp Stices Morsy IVING costs are controlled by two great systems L of finance—prepayment and postpayment. ‘To reduce the present high altitude of prices it is only necessary to reverse the operation of the systems, Convert prepayment into postpayment and you cut the cost of living in half. Conversely place every busi- hess transaction now postpaid, such as salaries, on a prepaid basis and you double the world’s wealth. Prepayment rests on the gullibility of the consuming sublic. “The purchaser always hopes to get more than his money's worth in a cash bargain. Oftentimes he schemes to get a little something extra for nothing. Invariable disappointment and the sorrowful realiza- tion that his money has been obtained under false pre- tences fail to shake his faith in the efficacy of advance payments. Unfortunately this system is deeply rooted in our present social scheme. Heaven even, under orthodox rules, is run on the prepayment plan. Man is required tomake a heavy outlay of good deeds on earth belore even a ray of hope is held out of returns in the torm of reward in the skies. Hell, however, runs to postpayment, according to the good people. A man may get his fun all in advance, but he is sure to pass the hereafter paying for it. Consider for a moment the benefits to be derived from a reversal of the system, with postpayment in place of prepayment, and prepayment where postpay- ment formerly ruled. If the color of the stenographer’s hair was discord- ant with one’s ego, or the brand of cigars the boss smoked failed to please, one could leave the second day without financial amputation. Lack of seats, mashed toes, or eyes suffering fro: being sharpened on hatpin points, would be valid rea- sons for refusal to pay the fare at the end of the journey. When a theater sent around its bill the day follow- ing a performance, one could-settle for whatever the show was worth— say about five cents on the dollar. With rent payable on moving out instead of in, a quiet existence could be enjoyed unruffled by un- reasonable monthly demands from grasping landlords, provided of course that one were content to live the same place. Dentists remunerated according to the number of teeth in good pres- ervation, would not be tempted lightly to pull a tooth Operations would be forestalled if the incentive were removed through payment made to doctors before: hand, and the world would be spared these painful extravagances. And even undertakers, paid in advance, would bestir themselves to keep their customers alive. Fully Occupied *Mum-mum—Mister Johnson,” « tatedly began young Jim-Tom Snarkey © Your dud-dud-daughter, Zanzaline. is—h’m! h’m—gug-going to be my wife, and- - “Well, dad-bum it, don't come to me for sympathy impatiently interrupted Gap Johnson. of Rumpus Ridge, Ark. “Tye got a sick horse on my hands.” A Willing Deputy PHEBE's dislike of Annabel is clear Although discreetly veiled from public sight; So tenderly and oft she calls her “dear,” She kisses her with such exceeding spite O Phebe, 1 would risk the venom shed- If you would give each kiss to me instead Desirable What would you like for a birthday: present, Mrs dearie? Mr. Betk~-Vour grocer’s head on a charger Drown by KR. B. Feruen Vanquished Knight—My Swit He sold me this suit as first qual cheapest for thi it is of hodd comicbooks.com