Judge — January 24, 1920 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

We will pay $1 each for acceptable “ inclosed, and no material published as“ considered for publication. contributors to this department. do not come within the range of this department. Bad Breaks’ amusing error of the types or a funny expression, JUDGE will pay $5. must be sent in to show the bona fide nature of the“ Bad Breaks” We beg the patience of our readers whose 3,000 paragraphs on hand and can print but a few of these each week. It is obvious that only mirth-provoking paragraphs can be published. A great many duplicates of acceptable material have been received. Priority of receipt. break.” No rejected is desired by JUDGE. No as shown by the postmark, determines their acceptance, and payment is made accordingly. An Official Opening—Simultancously with the lecture by Dr. Finley all orrt- CIALs of the education building will be open.—Albany (N. ¥.) Knickerbocker Press. Thirty-two Flivvers and a Dud Thirty-three of them were UNSUCCESSFUL and the other was a failure.—Huntington (Ind.) Herald. The Price of Health—Every com- munity has its recovered victims of tuberculosis, who, returned to health, are leading happy and useEtess lives.—Cleve- land (Ohio) Plain Dealer. Too Exclusive for Comfort—An all- millionaires’ apartment house, sixteen stories high, to cost FOUR THOUSAND DOLLARS, will be built soon in the exclu- sive Central Park, west part of the city.— Indianapolis (Ind.) News. Result of Prohibition—Many won- derful curses have been brought about by the use of this water, both internally and externally.—Tampa (Fla.) Tribune As She Trundled Her Wheel—The case against him is for running into an Easthampton girl with a bicycle while she was walking on a sidewalk, and breaking her leg.—orthampton (Mass.) cette How the Audience Felt About I:— There were expressions of regret when he magnificently the final number, ve.”"—Ft. Scott (Kans.) Tribune Monitor. The Profiteer’s Bait—D. J. Shea has bought a modern motor driven Simplex moving-picture machine for use at the Opera house, where he is starting a re- newal of motion pictures and vaudeville acts at a slight INCREASE IN PRICE as an attraction for the public.—Turners Falls (Mass.) Reporter This Week’s Prize ‘‘ Break”’ Contributed by Witus J. Hanson Sidney, Lowa For Heaven's Sake, Stay Where You Are, Dr. Todd! “Should Rev. Todd return from California, all the regular services of the church will be HELL morning and evening.”— Sidney (Ia.) Fremont Co. Herald. And Jail Their Eyebrows—Intern the EARS of men who haven’t enough respect for the laws and enough consideration for the safety of their fellowmen not to violate the traffic regulations.—Memphis (Tenn.) Press. Perhaps She Adored Cowslips, Also —He sent a rather clever selection of flowers before him. Roses and orchids would have conveyed an unpleasing impression to Sonia; parrres charmed her.—Parisienne Magazine for Nov. Lodging a Protest—A petition from the congregation of the First Presbyte- rian Church, of Huntington, praying for the PROTECTION of the ARMENIANS from Wheeling Lodge No. 128 B. P. O. E.— Wheeling (W. Va.) Intelligencer. Lungless—“On and on he went, no- body breathing.” —Red Book Magazine. The Negation of Intellect—A public hearing should be called in order to give careful consideration to a proposition that ought not to be thought of for a mo- ment.—Boston Record. The Most Modern Improvement— Wanted to rent, sleeping room with place to put up Ford car.—Lancaster (Mo.) Excelsior. 22 which may be clipped from newspapers, magazines dr books. The original clipping, with its source indicated in each instance, Bad Breaks” will be returned to senders unless postage is “Bad Breaks” ‘Bad Breaks” have been accepted for publication. The editor of * Bad Breaks” cannot enter into correspondence with yy For the most in advertisements will hereafter be We have some Mere typographical mishaps Rouge et Noir—D. W. Griffith’s latest and greatest picture, ‘Scarlet Days,” will be presented with an ALL-TAR cast. Broadway News. Wedded to the News—Yesterday young White left home and sent the an- nouncement of his father’s wedding, which took place several weeks ago TO A Brooxtyn paper.—New York Illus- trated News. Copping the Coppers—"‘Any PoLice OFFICER who accepts any present from anyone while UNDER ARREST will be sub- t to the penalty ” reads Chief Harry Smith's general order issued Friday.— Tacoma (Wash.) Times. A Repeating Victim—"Frank Sza- reiko was killed THREE Tres this after- noon.” —New York Tribune. The Subtle Irish—Love making by the girls of Ireland with members of the British government forces has been PrescripeD by the Irish Republican army.—Harrisburg (Pa.) Telegraph. How Come?—The Seventh street pub- lic school building in Marcus Hook Fire. Department, is confined to his bed with a heavy cold contracted while fighting fire. —Philadelphia Record. A Tearful Resolution—“That an at- tempt to solidify all independent and in- dustrial unions into the One Big on1on be made.” —New York Call. Enduring Ooze—Both carried over a pronounced tan, particularly the Pole, whose broad shoulders gleamed as the PERSPIRATION trickled down like a piece of BRonzeE—New Vork Herald. You Know the Kind—Punk and white brick cream and individual cakes were served by the little girls, Cleburne (Tex.) Enterprise. comicbooks.com