Judge — October 11, 1919 — page 26: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Drawn by Stoanr Hay NE good “Turn to the Right” de- serves another. The new case of rural regeneration is called “Adam and Eva” (though it has no more to do with the Garden of Eden or the clothing styles thereof than with the Eden Musée). The persons here bucolically rebuilt are, instead of Sing Sing alumni, just plain idle rich. For Jersey rusticity, it shows, can save you from the social glitter no less than from the social gutter. James King, blessed with two squandersome daugh- ters, one of whom has already brought him a faultlessly groomed parasite for a son-in-law, while the other is trying to choose between an indigent Scotch lord and a dough-seeking doctor; not to speak of a sister with costly fads, and a sponging he-relative with nerves— blessed with this household, King, millionaire though he is, becomes appalled at his problem as Provider. isn’t the initial cost of his family that worries him, it’s the awful upkeep. What is the use of his stretching the rubber industry, of which he is head, if his progeny and pensioners keep inflating their charge accounts likewise and likewiser? And so the Source of all Funds fumes, paws with impatience among the sere first-of-the-month bills that clutter his library table like a flurry of autumn leaves. Facing his fond family, he shakes at them his shattered check-book, threatening them with compulsory simple life. They are grieved. Papas, like policemen, are in posi- tions of trust; have no right to strike and leave people at the mercy of crooks and creditors. No, it isn’t nice of him. He had better go away from home for a while and have a little vacation, and then he'll feel kind and considerate again. With the assistance ot the doctor, Papa’s jewels work a scheme to ship him off to South America for his “health”; but the treasured par- ent, after being taken in at first and fancying himself actually ill, gets wind of their intention and alters Grace Grorce By Lawtos Mackatt Photo by Alfret Cheney Johnston Sreciaust in Spricuti- ness, Looxs Pensive ror 4 Cuanac 6 his arrangements in a way that shocks and pains them. He does depart, but leaves behind, in his stead, his alert young general manager from the office as Papa pro tem. This substitute Dad is to reg- ulate all expenditures, write all checks, and be ad- dressed as “Father.” When you know that young Father’s first name is Adam and unmarried daughter’s is Eva, you may guess, if you are gifted with uncanny prescience, just what will be the personnel of the love clinch at the final curtain. But it is decreed by the laws of the Medes and Broad- wayians that various things must happen ere that. About the time old Father is gliding up the Amazon, young Father is reading the economy act to his daugh- ters, who sulk thereat. It irks them that a man so crass as to wear a tie-clip and sleeve garters—a self-made person who never ate an artichoke—should squelch their pet extravagances. They rebel. Whereupon he, after thinking the situation over carefully, and no doubt recalling how well a similar ruse worked in “A Success- ful Calamity,” springs the fake news that old Father is financially flooey. They are stunned; then suddenly noble. They will go to work; they will even go to their ancestral farm in the uttermost part of Newark. And, sure enough, the last act reveals them toiling blithelyin their unpretentious Jersey nest, where they have developed a thriving bee and egg business. From the stacks of cartons and honey con- tainers in sight it is evident that both hens and bees are laying splendidly. The “Turn to the Right” peach jam industry had nothing on this except precedence. Snobby son-in-law has become a snappy clothing drummer; symptom-hipped uncle has cashed in on his nerve as an insurance solic- itor; unassigned aunt nurses a rich old invalid into marrying her. Old Father King returns to find his fam- ily in gingham and gladness. Saved from Plutocracy!—consol- ing thought. _ If happiness consists in being hard up how blissful we all are}