Judge — July 19, 1919 — page 28: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Irrepressible, Twelve People IT Know A gristle-necked old maid who smokes a pipe nosed bartender who quotes from the slick, round-faced boy who tries to buy his way through life \ girl, pretty 1 says“‘ain’t \ man who wor ve him. He has eyes like a 4 A crag-faced He is weak \ beetle-mouthe comes to a climax at his nose A wicked old man who is forever exclaiming “God bless my soul \ ham-handed athlete wt his tea A pale woman with hungry green eyes, who an with a jaw like a boulder athematician whose face likes lemon in works in a shop A red-headed spinster who writes love poetry for a living A famous preacher with the perfect poker face.—Princeton Tiger Pagan Worship I've never seen a Golden Calf She must give gold seal milk; But what I worship, half and half, Are two clad in real silk Irresponsible Until Flora—Nellic is just like cider. Florette—Uh huh Flora—So sweet until she starts to work Michigan Gargoyle In a Russian Play She—How did you get insky? He—With a latehky.—Penn Definition of an Optimist \ man who buys something from a Jew and expects to sell it toa Scotchman at a profit Nebraska Ategwun Another Jones First—Nery glad to meet you, Mr. Jones Funny we never met before up here. You're the Jones that sang on the Glee Club, I presume Second—No, I'm not gifted musically; don’t What did you like it, in fact that my love for you i 3 First—Let’s see, there are so many Joneses maybe I can place you. Hockey? Second—No, I'm not an athlete First—Debating? - Second—No. You get right up and dress with spec First—Were you the Jones on the honor rull You rush around, no time to feed : r . Second—Not on your life. You think you're first, but still you're late, ; : First—Say, do you do anything at all? You stand in line, and wait and wait Sci Rte > You get a book, sit down and write ccond— seth At get. & book ‘ First—Marvelous You see your Prof. and have a fight hale Becard , year.—Yale Record You have him sign, and think you're through, > It's a Great Life Let's room together next You're told there's still a lot to do. You go again to where you start You find they tear your book apart You stand in line and pay a fee You'll only then a student be Here It Is Again “Do you know anything about husbandry Mrs. Malaprop?” “Well, indeed Ido. I sent five daughters to Ann Arbor and got husbands for them all.” Michigan Gargoyle A Familiar Theory The wife of the economics professor was in anger and tears and was beating him over the cranium with a nut-cracker. “Why, oh, why did I ever marry you?” she screamed “Supply and demand, I guess, supply and demand."—Tennessee Sour Owl. 28 comicbooks.com