Judge — July 19, 1919 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Fake War Work—Senator Sherman at a dinner party: \ grocer. back in 1015 or 1016, was sanding his sugar with his errand boy's help “The errand boy, lifting a scoopful of sand, asked The usual proportion, sir?” », Joseph, of course not,” the gro “The usual propor: Joseph cer replied sternly tion in days like these, Joseph? where's your patriotism ?* “Then he sighed and added Only half the usual proportion of sand, Joseph—only half the usual pro: portion as long as our gallant troops at the front have such need of sand-bags.’ ” Detroit Free Press No Concentration The reason you dis of Bolshevism is that: you don’t understand it.” “Probably. Every time 1 get Kolshevists and think Lam beginning to understand, they start a riot and take my mind off the subject.” —Washington Star ove with Wet Nurse—Jones was one of those men who grumble at everything and everybody. He was once attacked by in flammatory rheumatism, and was care- fully nursed by his wife, who was devoted to him, in spite of his faultfinding dis position. His suffering caused her to No Use for a Hungry Lion Wy Pexrorsixc Lion at" TED ws Serw Now, then! I won't (London) burst into tears sometimes as she sat by his bedside One day him how he badly,” fault.” Impossible!” and asked “Badly, “and it’s my wife's a friend came in was getting on he exclaimed said the friend in’ sur- prise “Yes. the doctor told me that humid ity was bad for me, and that there woman sits and cries just to make it moist in the room.” —Knoxville Sentinel. Asking a Royal Favor Scene Sm Blighty (London Meo Exrerion of BuckincHast PALact all Urchin—Will you ask King George if I can get my ball out of his front gard 2 ave them nasty Fixps Irs Way OMAN TO Manacer’s y Scr thir Punch I can’t abide *em Balanced—The scrawny girls all go to the mountains and the plump little partridges all go to the beach. While the scrawny ones are sitting on the mountain bowlder in tune with the Cosmos, the other kind are wrestling over the pavilion floor in tune with the jazz and jazzing on all twelve cylinders with men.—Jackson ville (Fla.) Times-Union The Domestic Economist Mrs. Chatterton—Don't dare to argue with me. It won't do any good. Talk is cheap. Her Husband—Quite right, my dear. Talk is cheap in this household. The sup- ply so greatly exceeds the demand. Washington Star. Her Esthetic Sense—* What kind of woman is Mrs. Gadspur?” “Essentially artistic.” “How’s that?” “The family fly-swatter a bow of pink ribbon Ige-Herald. orned with Birmingham Wasted Apology —Muid—I am sorry to disturb your sleep, ma’am, but here is your breaklast Débutante—You don’t disturb me. have been Iving b waiting for it three | Washington Star for ‘ours. comicbooks.com