Judge — June 21, 1919 — page 8: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Knocking His Props Out By Tos P. Morcan HE Hon, Blackstone Hollar, the criminal lawyer and all-round weeper mous and wailer of Shellback County, Ark., sat down in a welter of perspiration, and flung his dank locks back from his bulging brow. He had just delivered a masterly and lachry- mose appeal in defense of a disreputable scallawag, and never doubted that he had won the case. The jury were in tears and the defendant snuffled audibly at the thought that such an immaculate saint as he had just been depicted should be put in jeopardy for even an instant “Pur-ty good speech.” drawled Cynis Fagg. the opposing counsel, a mossgrown old chimney corner practitioner, who was em- ployed for the prosecution only because none of the lawyers with political aspirations cared to go against the invulnerable Hon. “Pur-ty good speech the Hon‘able just got off. I thought so the first’ time I—p’tu!— heard it in defense of a hog-thief down in Bobshy coun ; and when I heard him make it at the trial of a bank swindler a spell later, and seven or eight times since at various—p'tu!—places ten years or so a In fact, I liked it so well that I can repeat it word for word now, if the nd keer to hear t think it worth while jury don’t feel fooled enough by it already It's such a good speech that the Hon‘able do more than change names and dates a: that what has fooled a dozen—p't to fool a dozen more. Hey, Hon’able?” Be it recorded that th in their conceits that the Hollar’s client without aving the room. Drown by Dossy McKee With No Apparent Connection Between the Two Subjects, Prohibition Has Strangely Increased the Carrying of Spare Tires by Motorists. 1 such trifles, nacher'ly holding juries, more or less, is good enough twelve men, good and true, were so pained brought in a verdict against the Hon. Mr. Down the Line By Hyrouw A. Frrzcrranp FELL in love with Reggy, dear, \ quartermaster man, you know; But then I met Lieutenant Ted And so I let poor Reggy go. The motor transport’s simply: great They told me Ted worked on the field, But, pshaw, I met a Major Jones And so poor Teddy had to yield Major Jones! My heart leaps yet. That doctor made them keep so clean But Jim bobbed up—the infantry— \ fighting man—the first I'd seen Well, Captain Jim quite won my heart, They said he showed them how to drill. An aviator then appeared Lieutenant White! My heart stood still L almost married Billy White, He did those loops and spins and twists; But then I met just Private Joe And soon forgot that White exists. Just plain old Private Joe, I know Outranked by all those friends of mine, But, gee, [ love him, he’s the best, With wounds and service stripes divine! Freedom of the Sees He—What do you think of these luxury taxes? She—Well, thank goodness, they didn’t tax a good cry. comicbooks.com