Judge, 1919-06-14 · page 28 of 36
Judge — June 14, 1919 — page 28: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a collection of brief jokes and humorous anecdotes from college newspapers, typical of Judge's "College Wits" feature. The content reflects early 20th-century campus life and social attitudes: **Key items:** - "Playing Safe" mocks rural ignorance - "Embarrassing" jokes about changing women's fashion (shorter skirts/hemlines) making it awkward for chivalrous escorts - "Quite Right" uses a racist stereotype (a Black servant character) to joke about fraternity hazing—pledges only receive small tips rather than meals - "Not All Dead Yet" satirizes an overly cautious professor obsessed with germs from kissing, who dies without ever experiencing intimacy - Various puns on "dry doc" (prohibition-era humor) and college life The page mixes gentle campus satire with period attitudes toward gender, race, and propriety that modern readers would find outdated or offensive.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Playing Safe One-cye Jake—Does the sun ever set in the east, Pete? Pete—1 don’t know, Jake, I ain’t been further nor Denver.—Widow As Usual How many subjects are you carrying? I'm carrying one and dragging three. Embarrassing It used to be That when A girl’s shoestring Came untied It was proper thing For her escort To tie it up again, But now With shoetops where they are Oh, well—!—Nebraska Awgwan. An Objectionable Drawing.—Yale Record. Punny Bono Semester—Have a drink, Doc? Doctor—No, I’m a prohibitionist B. S.—Ah, a dry doc!—Columbia Jester With the Gllege Wits hrepressible, Joyous, sir! I'll Columbia Jester Barber—Try a little celery ton make you look very nobby! Quite Right Rushee—Where are the Fraternity men's quarters? Sambo—Ah, don't think dey has any, suh; I’se been heah two weeks, shinin’ dey’re shoes an’ pressin’ dey’re clothes, and all I'se evah seen is two nickels.—Nebraska Awgwan Appropriate Temperature Visitors to Art School cold in this room? Student—We're studying friezes this week Columbia Jester Why do you keep it so Misrepresentation “That show is traveling under false repre- “Their poster says chorus of twenty and there’s not one in it under forty.”—Cornell Widow CLOCK WEAR, AS Om INT WANDS Frivotous Fottres—Nebrasta Awrwan a trespousible “Not All Dead Yet"’ Professor Isaiah O. Wisem, M.S., Ph.D., D.D.S., Spent his lifetime in writing a treatise Named, “ Danger of lip to lip kiss.” He'd counted the number of microbes As found on one lip in a day; He had a long list of diseases Which one might contract in this way He never had had these diseases, He never had kissed in his life; | Could any fact ever be plainer? (Yet some poor souls pitied his wife.) He died at the sleck age of forty— This man who had never been kissed. His book is forgot but the sad part, I wot, Is, he never will know what he’s missed! enn State Froth Repetition “Why, I thought you were taking Economics last year?” “Twas, but the Faculty encored me.”— Yale Record. cxel 22 [can’t hel, urk, you mean Cruel Thrust She—I dress to match my complexion He—Hand-painted gowns are right expensive, aren't they?—Nebraska Awgwan. a rnin a sees TO rorniots roe rate Ove> By \ awes from ton Cr shot “ toy re and ] tou shox that was afte min forti sum got tow the comicbooks.com