Judge — June 7, 1919 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Gardener Wilson Takes a Look at His Peace Patch “Could I have made a mistake? I was MATRI- MONY Limited Objection—/Jack—So Kitty's parents objected to her marrying. Tom—No, only to her marrying me. —Boston Transcript. A Trade Boomer—Mr. Styles—I was mistaken when I said you had no capacity for business. Mrs. Styles—I thought you’d change your mind. “You certainly have helped along the millinery and dressmaking business a whole lot.”” —Yonkers Statesman. Symptoms of the Season—“How’s the wife?” “Low-spirited.” “What's the trouble?” She needs a change of scenery.” joing to send her away?” No, I’m arranging to finance some spring togs.”—Birmingham Age-Herald. Camouflage of the Commonplace— One way to reduce the number of divorces would be to have people do their court- ing with their every-day clothes on.— Akron Times. Too Considerate—Mrs. Newbride— When you found that you couldn't accept the invitation to our wedding, why didn’t you send your regrets? Miss Rycal—Oh, I thought you'd ha enough of your own pretty soon, dear. —Boston Transcript. sje trompé! SPavais planté de Pol sitive I'd planted olive."—Le Rire (Pa Her Loving Thought—“And how many closets are there in the house you have just bought, dear?” asked the sweet young bride. “There are sixteen,” replied the hus- band. “But that’s hardly enough, Henry.” “What do you want with more than sixteen closets? That’s enough to hang your clothes in, is it not?" “Yes, dear. But you'll want part of one for your clothes, won’t you, Henry?” —Yonkers Statesman. Smooth Work—“How did Hicks mai ¢ to reform that nagging wife of his?” “Bribed her masseuse to tell her that talking caused wrinkles.” —Boston Tra script. Forget-Me-Nots in the Allies’ Garden The time has come to gather the whole bunch.—London Evening News. 20 Remorse prison camp *Yess* “How was the food there?” “Don’t ask me to answer a question like that, but I'll say this much. If I ever run across the old lady I used to board with”—overcome by the recollec- tion of the mean remarks he used to make about those Sunday night suppers of cold ham and grits, the returned doughboy applied a handkerchief to his eyes and hastily walked away.—Bir- mingham Age-Herald. Chicken Soup a la Vacuum—Land- tady—You say this chicken soup isn’t good? Why, I told the cook how to make it! Perhaps she didn’t catch the idea? Boarder—No; 1 think it was the chicken she didn’t catch.—London Tit- Bits. The Gourmet Raves—‘Some day,’ remarked the gourmet, ‘“‘we shall be able to dine perfectly. Many cities have their food specialties and unless eaten on th spot they are never so good. There's where the swift aeroplane comes in. I shall begin my meal in Boston with steamed clams. Ten minutes later I shall be in New York e ing a plate of delicious turtlesoup. This is followed by a planked shad in Philadelphia and chicken and waffles ‘Maryland style’ in Baltimore. on to Richmond for a course of Virginia ham and salad. To Florida for dessert, and then, the wind being favorable, I cross to Cuba for a perfect ar and the meal is finished.”"—Boston Transcript The Fuel Problem—Mrs. Redd— Where are we going to stop for lunch, dear? Mr. Redd—Well, we'll have to stop for gasoline first, and it all depends upon what they charge in that particular town for gasoline whether it will be worth while to stop for lunch or not.—Yonkers Statesman. Hortikultur Into my garden Came a pup, And now my radish seeds Are up. —Detroit Free Press.