Judge, 1919-05-31 · page 8 of 36
Judge — May 31, 1919 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Political and Social Satire from Judge Magazine This page contains three distinct humor pieces from the post-WWI era: **"The Hold-Up"** satirizes a Tennessee hill-billy drafted into the military. "Hank" had evaded revenue officers (Prohibition enforcers) for years but cannot escape military discipline. The joke: when the armistice ends the war, he refuses to wake for reveille, claiming he's "quit" it—misunderstanding that the war's end doesn't exempt him from camp duties. **"The Flatbush Flyer"** is a brief joke about mistaken identity: an uncle sees someone climbing a building's exterior and assumes it's a "steeple-jack" (professional climber), but it's actually a suburbanite chasing a train. **"Mary Spreads Her Net"** is a romantic poem about a woman using tennis as a social stratagem to attract men, playing on period anxieties about women's changing roles and shorter skirts. The smaller "His Obfuscation" depicts a hired man's absurd excuse-making to his employer about standing idle.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Drown by BW. Kewis Tue Horpn-Up No “One Clear Call" for Him “Hank” Abernathy was a long, lank, lean and lengthy hill billy from the mountains of Tennessee and in all his sweet twenty-one years of idleness nothing had ever bothered him but revenue ers until the draft landed him in a northern training camp where reveille, even on the frostiest of mornings, was rigidly observed well before sunup. When the bugle sounded the first morning after the armistice was signed Hank never even turned over in his cot What's matter, Hank?” asked his bunkie. “Sick?” “You all know I done quit r-e-v-i-l-l-e-i-n-g,” drawled Hank. The Flatbush Flyer Uncle Hiram—Gosh, Nevvew, just look at the steeple-jack goin’ up the side of that building. City Neph 5:31 Aerial L Nonsense, Uncle. That’s a Suburbanite going up to catch the nited. Mary Spreads Her Net By Doveras Marrocn M28¥ spe s her net for tennis And i me to the court Makes me put away “Pendennis” Thackeray must wait on sport Mary is a charming sort, Captivating now and then is; Who to reading would resort When she spreads her net for tennis? Mary spreads her net for tennis. Mary's arms are summer-swart; Blooming Mary's cheek again is; Mary’s skirt is somewhat short Love and Cupid hold the fort; You kn what the fate of men is. Are things just what they purport? Does she spread her net for tennis? His Obfuscation “Well, now, if it is a fair question,” chided Farmer Hornbeak, “is continuing in that attitude what I am paying you wages for? What's the idee of standing there like a heathen image, with one foot in the air?” “I am trying to decide,” replied the hired man, “which way is a bee-line to the best shade.’ Drown by ALT. Mommie Butterty—Good morni O'Clock Miss F.O'C—Good morning to you Mr. Yellow Edge. Sorry to say I've had to move my name back an hour. For the rest of the summer I'm Miss Three O'Clock. z, Miss Four | 1] comicbooks.com