Judge, 1919-05-03 · page 8 of 36
Judge — May 3, 1919 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page contains multiple satirical pieces from the WWI era: **"If They Really Talked Headline English at the Peace Table"** mocks the Paris Peace Conference (likely 1919) by having world leaders speak in exaggerated newspaper headline style. Lloyd George, Clemenceau, Orlando, Marquis Saionji, and President Wilson each voice their nations' competing post-war demands—territorial claims, reparations, naval power—revealing how their lofty peace rhetoric masks naked self-interest. The satire suggests these leaders' grandiose public statements obscure petty nationalist conflicts. **"Yeomanette?"** jokes about a Navy officer unfamiliar with shore-based American facilities, asking about a "king-room" (latrine) in a community center—mocking military pretension and cluelessness. **Other pieces** include a drinking song lamenting Prohibition, a joke about racial hierarchy in the segregated military (a promoted Black soldier snubbing a lower-ranked white one), and complaints about Army food. The cartoons satirize post-war disillusionment, military absurdities, and class/racial tensions in 1920s America.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
by Avo. Hennen If They Really Talked Headline English at the Peace Table By Fostex Ware Lloyd George (addressing chair)—Well, now to speed up peace pact and avert red menace. I come to flay critics and demand action. The way this body lags in task stirs world. British unrest grows. Now is the time to reap fruits of blood-bought victory. Orlando—Permit me to state that Italy claims soil rights, won at frightful cost. Rome alarmed at rumor of J. Slav coup in Adriatic. The Teut peril is not dead yet, feared. Clemenceau—France would have Hun foot great war bill. The blood-guilt must be fixed on ex-Kaiser Then huge indemnity exacted. Also, we would spare Hun fleet lest world peace pact fails. Marquis Saionji—Slice of Russ soil is Jap claim. Then, too, we shall need big fleet to foil Hun Pacific grip plot. Hence, Tokio balks at League. President Wilson—l_ see mankind united for league draft pact, since world facing chaos demands lasting peace pledge. Fortunately, world food shortage crisis past. May I not take this occasion to deny hitch report in Teut envoy confab. Yeomanette? By K. Ripae Buacewau, U.S. Cowt Guard It was his first night on shore, and his chief's uniform, with its two rows of shiny buttons, made him feel like a British admiral \ bit at sea in one of New York's Com- munity Centers, he asked two gobs who were entering the dance hall the location of the king-room. With a friendly grin, one replied, decks down,” and then, glancing at the chief's wo Lest He Forcet—Tuose Harry Days Ballade for Booze Artists By Grower Wo Mereay O: SAD is this poor heart of mine With a hey, Tom-aud-Jerry, O! longer flows the sparkling wine I'l cast myself into the brine. Gin fizzes, O, gin fizzle! O, parchéd is my throat and dry With a hey, steins and seidels, Of O, who is he more peeved than 1? I long to lay me down and die, Manhattan, O, martini! Away across the seas I'll sail With a hey, benedictine, O! Vil go where gloom can naught avail I'll ive on whisky, beer, and ale, Mint juleps, O, bacardi! Military Salutation Ry Por. Au Mo Sreant, Camp Ler, Va \ colored private with gold chevrons passed a former friend wearing silver ones, without even a nod of recognition. Silver Chevrons—What's de matter, bud? Doesn't you" ‘o' old pal? rons (haughtily)—I doesn’t recognize no man wid recognize Gold Ch white feathers on hi Silver Chevrons one wid yellow streaks! ‘~* arm. grily)—An’ I sho’ was a fool to recognize During Bunk Fatigue By Por, Kiwen Pencser, 166 Depot Brigade, Camp Lewis, Washington First Rookie—Where you going now that the war is over? Second Ditto—Some place where they don’t call stewed prunes “fruit.” The Port of Cussing Men There are no decorations on the Brest of France. rating, two crossed quills, quickly added with a Denes by J. Hasiuros Wanuzaws knowing wink to his buddie, “Two floors down chief, two floors.” ¢ farmer habit of leaving the economy, gives her spouse a powerful hint about inery outside for months in all weathers. str ‘