Judge — March 1, 1919 — page 27: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

March 1, 1919 Years ee The | WITH the COLLEGE wits | : Irrepressible, Joyous, Irresponsible Judy. EE a score 3arry sian Cryp- utlaw rican ; unny nally from vide- A e for ical ‘Back Acats!™ ; fla- Logic Alto, Rhetoric Prof~-What are the distinguishing Hous differences between induction and deduction? — Former S. A. T. C.—I1 was inducted into the ho’s service and my pay was deducted.—Gargoyle Be- Pacifying Mother , Daughter—Everett kissed me last night nel Mother (indignantly)—That is outragcous. . Did you sit on him for it? rion Daughter—I did.—W idow ight In French bet \ savoir faire mam’selle. tie Who was known as the Marscillaise belle the Was asked for a kiss and By a soldier named Bliss, And she told him to gaux straight teaux helle. om Pelican. ork : Aftermath Ine He—So you are giving me back my ring, my etters and all the presents that I ever gave In- ‘ou? She—Yes He—Then 1 suppose 1 must do likewise If ou will wait a moment I'll return the silk sus penders you gave me for Christmas.—Gargoyle mat, 11 x 14, ‘for twenty-five cents, cash or stamps. 25 pondge Art Print Department attractive picture. is a reproduction of one of Judge’s recent covers, in full colors, | mounted on a heavy ready for framing. We will] send it, postage free, “THE MAN MAN IN THE MOON” | | is the title of hie It New York City | Who Pays the Check? |. No matter who “gives the party,” there is always another check each man must settle himself —the check Nature presents for over-eating—lack of exercise— lack of care in diet or habits. Often you do not realize that Nature is marking up that check against you. You are only a “little out of sorts.” So you try to force yout bowels to move with a pill, or some salts, a glass of mineral water, or perhaps some castor oil. Not only will the constipation grow worse with the continuance of such reme- dies, but the dose must be con- stantly increased with an_ ever- weakening effect. You will pay that check. You needn't. Nujol will keep your Nujol Laboratories, Stan New York. Please send me free booklet Co. (New Jersey), Room 116-L, 50 Broadwi Thirty Feet of Danger.” vent bowels clean easily, thoroughly, and at regular intervals, and with a beneficial, soothing action upon your intestinal tract. It cleanses so naturally that internal cleanliness be- comes a readily attainable virtue. Take Nujol, and you can be sure that your system is getting rid of the food waste that otherwise would lodge in your system, breed- ing poisons to undermine your vitality. Get a bottle of Nujol fromyour drug- gist today, and write for free book- let, ‘Thirty Feet of Danger”. i . Jed bottle Warning: arin oor ea Al druggists in U.S. and Canada. Insist on Nujol. You may su ferlrom substitutes, Nujol Laboratories STANDARD OIL CO. (NEW JERSEY) 50 Broadway, New York And Yet! My man’s not smart, nor cute, nor pretty He cannot dance or skate. He isn’t clever, gay or witty His line. out of date. He never pulls this baby talk, But by the stars above, Could you but see him in the dark Oh! girls, how he can love!—Record. Never Touched Her Guy—Do you know Lincoln’s Gettysburg address? Jane—I thought he lived at the White House. —Sun Dial. . Unnatural Science “Children,” said the teacher toward the close of the geography lesson on Austra “there is ohe animal that no one has mentioned. It is quite tall, and does not stand up on its legs all of the time. It cannot walk like other animals and people, and takes funny little skips. What is “Charlie Chaplin, fans on the front seat yelled the row of movie Gargoyle. Stung I kissed her tempting ruby lips, An act quite diabolic; For since I stole those honied sips I have the painter's colic.— Pelican. comicbooks.com