Judge — January 11, 1919 — page 29: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

| WITH the COLLEGE WITS Since 1786 oe hundred and thirty-three years ago the Evans’ OOKS—COMFORT HEALTH—L' ° ; fa | Irrepressible, Joyous, Irresponsible teenies The ie work et foot geoe'stous ie embeded os a » OWHeeona «.. THE ‘‘WONDER” aw,aite ede Santi VO’ 3 HEAL TH BELT The Weil Health Belt Date Grocers No Gevernment License Required HUDSON, N, ¥. \ Short Story I say, Alfred, why is’t that a Liberty Bond Literal | is similar to an absorbing book?” Having Trouble with the Crank Case.—Wid “Does she dress well?” “T cawn't imagine, Cedric—elucidate.” “LT dunno; I never watched her.”—Tiger. “Because, old fellow, the interest is ir Lament of One Who Played in Bad Luck to the end.” The Higher the Fewer dh, yes! Quite a novel investment.” NEVER bought a pair of skates Widow But what the ice would melt; I never leave suspenders off Soaking Him One That I don't lose my belt; I never bought a new canoe But all the lakes went dry; I never sce a pretty girl | But cinders rook my eye; If ever I attempt to dance, The orchestras all cease; And now I’m old enough to fight, The Germans beg a peace!—Limpoon. In Latin Class Freshman translating “portamus” Now “mus” means “we” and “porta” means “gates,” but I thought “we gates” was German.—Record. | At the Depot | “ Good-by, dad, don’t fail to write, even if it’s only a check.—Widow. Down the Main Hatch Kansas—Well, Silas, I guess the chicken is a back number. An egg is only a small thing after all Missouri—Is that so? Curious One—And did it not get on your nerve Kansas—Yep, they've done invented mine- |, terribly when a Hun plane started up in pursuit? layers now.—Cha parral. Aviator—Yeh, made me soar.—Widorw f ee e f e if 2 i) FOR WEDDINGS Petronas Flowers should come first in your list of . Sorist., Wedding Gifts. They convey your message. P Your local florist, within a few hours, can deliver fresh flowers in any city or town in the United States and Canada through the Florists’ Telegraph Delivery service, (‘7 She—Is Jack Havabier really such an awful | rounder? He—Is he? Why, even his shoes are tight. | —Record. ‘ comicbooks.com