Judge, 1919-01-11 · page 25 of 32
Judge — January 11, 1919 — page 25: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page mixes **WWI soldier humor** with advertisements. The main comic content includes: **"A Pre-Peace Plant"** (poem): A disillusioned soldier reflects on military training—drilling, marching, building shelters—then expresses frustration that he won't see combat before the war ends. The satire targets the absurdity of intensive preparation without purpose. His cynicism about lost faith, rusted rifle, and uncleaned bayonet mocks both military discipline and his own apathy. **Mirror Mathematics & Soldier Vanity**: A cartoon and math puzzle joke about soldiers obsessively checking mirrors, equating a woman's mirror time (15 minutes) with a soldier's need for presentability and "certainty of presentability"—satirizing masculine vanity and military grooming standards. **"Ex-Subway Rider"** (bottom cartoon): A soldier in a cramped military transport says it's the first time he's been comfortable since leaving home—dark humor about civilian subway conditions versus wartime discomfort. The **Dr. Sheffield's Crème Dentifrice advertisement** occupies significant space, typical of Judge's revenue model. All content reflects the **January 1919 timeframe** (war ending), capturing soldiers' mixed feelings about demobilization and return to civilian life.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
IDGE ff January U1, 1919 2S AT TENT AND DECK Continued from Opposite Page i — - i a. oo Old 1. G. L. | Mirror Math- | ematics | Ny Per, N.R. O'HLans | S.A The average size a . . fa woman's favorite HITE teeth are a gift of Nature but clean teeth are a health essential which everyone may have by using mirror is 2 x 5 feet c 1¢ Dentifric x5 fect=23x60 | Dr. Sheffield’ inches. It is no longer necessary to impress upon thinking people 24 x 60 inches= | — the necessity of using a dentifrice. But it is vitally essential 1440 square inches. that_ the most efficient tooth cleanser be chosen. Dr. The average sizeof Sheffield’s cleanses the teeth in the pleasantest possible man- a soldier's regulation | ner. It claims no virtues which would place it in the mirror is 30% 5 position of usurping the field of the dentist. i's Créme Dentifrice costs but 25¢ fora large tube. It is the Wes, 5x 5 inches= ts | product of the oldest tooth paste manufacturers in An The square inches. purest and best ingredients are used and it is formulated in accordance with o latest accepted theories of dental science. Ask your DR:SHEFFIE A woman will | gyrate for fifteen minutes in front of her mirror before she is sure of being prop- Coxsoniy, 1 BP, Franc By Por, Lawnnsen Mow none and cleanly, from I VE shot a million targets full of .30-.30 holes, the peak of his And I've stabbed a million dummy sacks of | campaign hat to the hay. toes of his service lve pitched a million shelters, made a million | shoes, in a few glances at his mirror directed from blanket rolls, different angles. Ry Por. M.O. Tires, Camp Upton, New York \nd I've hiked a million miles by night and day. .°.1440A woman's sense of security: a sol- Sergeant (drilling a bunch around the corner) — It was drill, review, inspection from the dawn to | dier's certainty of presentability. Dress out on the line! | (Pet. Necer-Had-a-Pass—Where is it? Looking for “ta Skirt’ order ot?” dewy was practi Now it's ov you, I believe I could knock a troop of Uhlans off their fect. ; Quod erat demonstrandum. neral ¢, school and drill, and then repeat. d I'm “finished,” let me tell | Fond Recollections sir ined Gee, it gets my goat to see them—all these dough- boys on the hike; You can tell the drive we heard about has come. I've been waiting for an order that will start me down the pike, Sut the guy supposed to give it must be dumb. because I’m clean forgotten I am losing faith and trust, For I don’t believe I'll get to fire a shot. So I've let my pistol canker and I've let my rifle rust, \nd I don’t care if my bayonct’s clean or not. | not ng?” "if 1 fraid two given 'inels n by Pact, J. Masson, U. 8.8. America | erly presentable for Sent Gosh! [think I'll stay in the Navy view, from her coif- . ia ~ oe fure to her toe-tips. ‘The A Bie Peace Paint A soldier will be certain he is neat They kid me with the story it’s the most impor- tant game you Getting ammunition over to the guns. nds? f ladmit it’s indispensable—and also pretty tame— 3.” For gosh! I crossed the pond to fight the Huns. with Sv Um telling you in secret—but you mustn't say a word— em’s iUs about an awful shortage that I've found. ~but ! got it from a doughboy and he tells me that he | pron by div He snuaws, U8, RS. Richmond, Ve side heard Ex-Subway Rider (On Bottom)—By George, this is the first time I've been comfortable since That there ain’t enough of Huns to go around! I left home.