Judge — October 26, 1918 — page 25: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

| | =I him to willing falling t thing ne Was turally came ere is oF surely Cc. O. wants ces at im in td. f bars it else tened October 26, 1918 Time for a Change By Senckast Resseit Campuntt, Co, H, Sind Infantry, Gatun, Canal Zone, Panama RIVATE MURPHY, who didn’t have a very good record, was called before the captain for breaking certain regulations. The Captain—Murphy, I see you haven't a very clean sheet Mur phy—No, sir; the laundry has not arrived. The Mystic y Paivare ROW, Trine. Co. No. 6, Photography Schou! of Aerial “T see,” said an elderly lady to a soldier, “that you wear a U. S. button while some of the boys have ‘ * on theirs, Why is that, may I “Yes'm; you sce that ‘N. A." means ‘New \dditions. The Eager Patriot attery B y Mavare Locts Winuas Lanowsny, Camp Funston, Kane First Sergeant—Suppose a deserter passed on the other side of your post, would you call the corporal of the guard? wo-Weeks Rookic—Hell, no! collect those fifty bucks myself. I'd get him and Downhill Work Trine, Co. No. 5. Phetography, Rocke By Pasar ROW The director was giving the boys a few exer- cises before breakfast. “The next movement is ywn as the ‘Bicycle,’ he explained; ch n will lie upon his back: at the count of one bring your right knee up sharply—at two re turn the right and bring up the left and repeat until I say, *Halt.’” The exercise was well under way and the direc- tor was counting “one—two, one—two,” when all at once he noticed Private O'Reily near the front was lying still with both knees drawn up under his chin. “What’s the matter there. the director yelled — “have you got a cramp?” “Oh, no,” said Pat, “I’m coasting.” Wasn Day, Wwen youe Seer aia cere A FLASH AT YOU It YOUR” FATIOUES™ Draven by Pawate HE, Ressent, Co, B., $28, Ba. ToC, “ENTERPRIS When I Get Home By Pawsee Arwooo Haraer Towysexn, U.S. A. Sernice, ALE. P Ambulance I don’t want no “Welcome” archway, I don’t want no big brass band, I don't want no gawdy dinner, I don’t want no grip of hand. I don’t want no celebration— Flags and cheers and all them things— I don’t care if ‘‘o’er the crowd's heads Loud the martial music rings.”” I don’t want no more parading, Or any foolish blurbing pome, nt to find . . .and “tooty-sweety” That little girl I left back home. Ya The Force of Habit By Seacrest Tnowss Loxcrntow. Co. Camp Shelby, Miss 152nd Infantry, Veteran—When 1 get out of the army [I’m never going near a big city Recruit—Why? Veteran—Because if a tra his whistle, I would instinctively start to police up the street cop should blow * He Never Thought of That By Paivare Rowenr J. Swaw, Hdgr. Co., Deput ‘Lee First Lieutenant Kennedy was instructing his platoon of rookies as to how they should make out their clothes slips. “Now, men,” said the lieutenant, “you will order your shoes two sizes larger than those you have worn in civilian life, because the long hikes will cause the feet to spread ‘aw, suh,” horned in a very large farmer from western Virginia, “not me. The lieutenant was surprised at this remark, which made him a bit angry. Raising his voice he asked the farmer why he refused to wear his shoes two sizes larger Because, suh, they don’t make shoes two ‘sizes larger than I wear.” Little Joys of Army Barons Bas Divine ees ne SRE ST else Wik iet porta ncnie 4 AS ASSAYS Camp Tobyhanna, Pa. or Great Pitu anv Moy tT.’ —Hamlet. Higher Mathematics Ky Conronst ROA. Anmisos, 18th Service Co HERE were fifteen of us (privates) ordered down here to open up a supply depot. Pri- vate Martin having punched a typewriter in the orderly room, was put in charg En route it occurred to him that he should count the men and sce if we were all there. So he started: 1—2--3-——4-—-up to 14. Where could the other one be? He dashed to the back of the train, then to the front, looked in every nook and cor- ner, but the other man could not be found. He counted us over again—only fourteen! What was he going to do? How could he ever face the major and make such a report? The long- coveted corporal stripes faded in the distance. Then one of the boys took pity on him and asked him: ‘How many men did you count, Martin?” “Only fourteen,” said Martin, like a man say- ing “Guilty. “Well, that’s enough,” said the other. are the fifteenth man. ‘You Easy Sledding By Senceast Puen B. Sawren, Pow Hospital, Fort Howard, Md. Reddy O’Brien was caught in the second draft, and, being an unusual sort of chap, with the usual New York toughness, was away out of place in the army, and the understanding of military dis. cipline. he commanding officer at the training camp he Was sent to decided that three months of good hard training would make him a good sol- dier. After a few weeks, the company comman. der called him into his office, and asked him just what branch of the service he would prefer. Red wanted to know what other branches there were. “Well,” the C. O. replied, “you can choose the infantry and walk, or the cavalry and ride, or the aviation and fly.” “Well.” Red replied, “if it is all the same to you, I will take the coast artillery and coast. comicbooks.com