Judge — August 17, 1918 — page 27: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

August 17, 1918 The Smallest Soldier. By Vircixia Woovs Macwatt I. His Bir THe soldiers march along the street, And I am marching, too; I guess they'll march across to France ! Before they're through. I really cannot walk so far; My mother thinks it best, | After I’ve gone a block or two, To stop and rest. Sixes and Sevens By Avwert E. Hovt proposed concert of nations would get over all right with | the Kaiser, if he could sign up to beat the base drum, 2 We figure that this new-fangled job of Alien Property Cus- todian is where the Mrs. lets you hold the money long cnough to pay her bills. The Berlin Vorswaerts says that Germany wants honor.” Peace with honorariums, more likely. 2 Says the New York Globe: “Were the people of Ausiria- Hungary today the rulers of their own land, the Empress Zita peace with * | could not be at the mercy of Berlin-directed calumny Were Chairman Hays has outlined the Republican platform for 1920. | the people of Austria-Hungary the rulers of their own land, there Platforms are those queer would be half a dozen things the voters used to [_ —— —_ - Empress Zitas—or there ; read, before the war, with | wouldn’t be any. 0 the idea that they set forth | s f =what the party would do | A girl used to be supposed f if it got in—and happened to stick around home to n to feel like it. | get her husband, but nowa- i s | days she wouldn’t do it to get yours. A want ad of the future ; (maybe): Wanted, a Secre- ; | Emperor Karl, of Austria, tary of the Treasury. Must | F used to think he ruled by ef Must be able to fire a had that conference with the : railroad locomotive, or a | Baer Ne me ne nt bats : ? aaa | thing of an atheist himself. railroad president, also to | | « mene to-date men’s _ suitings: at, * | ¢ | Your last year’s coat d e. Sinn Feiners, we read, | \ Yom totter orated with all the latest or may be imprisoned “dur- | 4 war drive buttons. | ar ing the King’s pleasure.” | * j The King’s pleasure nowa- | Lots of folks think that | days is brief and infrequent — = - -~——- + speaking German ought to | enough to suit the most be forbidden in the United | ty exacting prisoner. Greene, THE WeaLtuy Ftorist, Designs His Own Limousine States and in Hoboken. | comicbooks.com