Judge, 1918-06-22 · page 8 of 36
Judge — June 22, 1918 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several brief humorous anecdotes satirizing American society circa early 20th century. **"Ideal Conservation"** mocks excessive efficiency obsession—a young woman rewrites a letter to use less paper, demonstrating how conservation-minded thinking becomes absurdly wasteful of time. **"Stimulating"** jokes that a husband loves his extravagant wife because her spending forces him to work harder—turning financial burden into motivation. **"Revolutionary" and "A Local Phenomenon"** are rural tall tales: one about a Southern town's seating preferences shifting, another exaggerating Texas sandstorms so severe prairie-dogs dig holes in mid-air. **"Bobbie's Scheme"** references Secretary McAdoo (likely William McAdoo, WWI-era Treasury Secretary) and government agricultural takeovers, satirizing a boy's expectation that Washington will manage his chicken farm. **"The Ominous One"** jokes that a secondhand car is so disreputable-looking that children flee from it in terror—the car's appearance, not the driver, causes alarm. These are gentle social satire and rural humor typical of Judge's satirical approach.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Ideal Conservation N a certain office where efficiency and general con- servation had been vigor- ously effected, a young lady had thoughtlessly written a letter on a full sheet of paper whereas she could have used a half sheet. She took the letter out of the typewriter and tore it up, and re-wrote it on a half shee “T must not waste stationery she said, “by using a full sheet when the letter can be written on a half sheet.” Stimulating “T don’t see how Piler can be so much in love with such an extravagant womanas his wife.” “Why he says she is a con- stant stimulus to renewed exer- tions.”” Revolutionary “ There has been a right smart change in Tumlinville since I was there last, a couple of months ago,” related Gap John- son, of Rumpus Ridge, Ark. “Then most of the prominent citizens were setting on the sunny side of the court house. Now they are setting on the shady side.” A Local Phenomenon Rookie (on the Texas border) —I hear that you have very severe sand storms down here. Old Regular—Man, if you hang around down in these parts as long as I have you'll see. They have them so bad down here that you can see prairie-dogs digging holes ten feet in the air. His Nicut Bobbie's Scheme Bobbie—It costs so much for chicken feed that I haven't been able to make any moncy out of my hens. Father—What are you going to do—sell out? Bobbie—Well, I thought I'd first write to Mr. McAdoo and get the government to take ‘em over. The Quarrel Mrs. Willis—What did Mr. and Mrs. Bump quarrel about? Mrs. Gillis—Religion. Mrs. Willis—You don’t say! Mrs. Gillis—Yes; she wanted to attend a church that has an unmarried preacher and he wanted to attend one that has a lot of pretty girls in the choir. Drazon by Orson Lowett The Ominous One A MOTORIST. journeying through the Rumpus Ridge region of Arkansas, in a second hand car of a well known and much joshed make, observed ahead of him in the big road a bunch of Gap Johnson’s children playing in the dust. As the sound of his horn reached them they hopped up apprehensively, and as he came rattling and tuttering along the youngsters tore yelling for the safety of the house or shinned frenziedly up handy trees. “My gracious!” exclaimed the motorist to Mr. Johnson, who was leaning over the fence. “What in the world is the matter with those kids? Do I look like the kind of a man who would deliberately run over them or chase them up trees?” “Nope.” was the reply, “but that looks like that kind of a car.” Eventnc Up Otp Scores comicbooks.com XUM