Judge, 1918-04-13 · page 9 of 36
Judge — April 13, 1918 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three satirical pieces mocking American political and social conventions circa the Progressive Era. **"Close to the Soil"** ridicules verbose politicians. Hon. Solon Smugg delivers a speech touching every current reform issue (initiative, referendum, prohibition, equal suffrage, single tax) without taking clear positions—he simply advocates *or* denounces each, leaving listeners confused about his actual stance. The joke: politicians use rhetoric to appear engaged while saying nothing substantive. **"A Fair Proposition"** satirizes rural frontier attitudes. When a boy refuses adenoid surgery, a backwoods father suggests the doctor operate on a large man instead—implying the procedure should be tested on someone bigger first, inverting medical logic humorously. **"Her Reluctance"** and the top cartoon mock female reputation anxieties in service-industry jobs. A waitress worries that allowing unknown men physical familiarity compromises her standing; only "regulars" earn that privilege. The final joke about amateur barbers uses hedge-trimming as absurd credential-building. All pieces employ rural dialect and working-class perspectives to highlight social absurdities.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
|. HENKEL “The Government foresces a sible shortage in clothing. Now I’m somewhat concerned whether Ethel and you, dear, can make a sacrifice. Glose to the Soil By Tost P. Moxcax His Masterly Effort € HE Hon. Solon Smugg delivered a ringing | address at the op’ry house last night,” said old Riley Rezzidew. “Inno uncertain tones he advocated or denounced —I couldn’t actly make out which—the initiative and refe endum, the recall of judicial decisions, good roads, the short ballot, militarism, prohibition, equal suffrage, single tax and the election of senators by popular vote; defied all foreign powers and potentates, condemned the predatory rich and showed whither we are inevitably drifting; point- ed with pride to himself and viewed the opposition candidates with alarm; declared that the Gur- rand Old Ful-lag should never trail in dust; drank six glassfuls of sparkling water; and in a voice trembling with emotion told us that he had never before been honored by a more intelligent audience and several other funny stories. Outside of that the Hon. never said a word.” A Fair Proposition “T HIS little fellow should be operated on for adenoids,” said Dr. Hackaway. Thereat Bearcat, the four-year-old olive branch, uttered a terrible howl and fled toward the tall timber. “Listen at him, waking the dead at every jump!” exclaimed Mr. Gap Johnson, of Rumpus Ridge, Ark. “Well, if the little cuss feels that-a- way about it, let him go. And I reckon, Doc, you'd better take somebody of your size. S’pose you operate on Coonrod, there. He’s as big as a man, and if he ain’t got anything the matter with him now, he prob’ly will have some time.” Her Reluctance “WHAT'S Imogene peeved about now?” asked the cook in a rapid fire restaurant. “Looks like she’s flapping up in the tree tops the most of the time.” “Aw, a guy that she had never laid eyes on before chucked her under the chin,” replied a waitress. “Imogene is funny that way, and she says thatonly about ten or a dozen of the regulars can put that over. A girl has got to be careful of her reputa- tion, she says, in a place like this.” Open to Suspicion The visiting ally—Are your current magazines here generally loyal? The patriot—Mostof’em. But I noticed in the cover design of the last number of “Ticklish Tales” the young fellow who wa ing the pretty girl wore citizen’s clothes. Drawn by ALEXANDER SAss “Say! Did you ever cut hair before?” “No, but I’ve often trimmed my own hedge.