Judge — April 13, 1918 — page 26: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HAT Trip to See Your Girl at Col- lege—1. That train ride—2 hours surplus over guaranty. 2. That meeting at the station. That hand- shake, oh dear! 3. That dinner. That balance of trade in favor of the waiter with the check. 4. That afternoon about the campus; that enthusiasm about those awful buildings. 5. That vesper service. That feeling of the presence of Morpheus. 6. That good-bye. Again that hand- shake, oh my! Professor—Where is Solomon's Temple? 2t--Do you think I don’t know any- thing? Professor—Where was it, then? ’21—Why! On the side of his head, of course. General—Well, what news? Private—The enemy wanted to borrow some cannon balls? General—Did you let them have them? Private—Sure, they promised to’ send them back in the morning. What He Saw As I was coming up the hill, I met her coming down, and still "Tis true she passed quite near, I can’t describe her gown. And whether she was short or tall, Or thin, or dark, or fair, I'm sure I couldn’t say at all, Or half portray her hair. And were her eyes of ocean blue? And was her mien demure? I'll have to leave the guess to you, I really can’t be sure. For—(perhaps you'll say it's shocking, Or perhaps you'll only think) For my eyes fell on her stocking; It was ruby tinted pink. RRHEARD in Sociology Class — He—In Adam’s day women were cheaper than they are now. She—How so? He—Why Adam got Eve for one bone. I stepped into a shoe shop to get myself re-shod, And chanced to hear a blushing bride inquire, As she scrutinized with care a pair of patent leather shoes: “Hoiw long before the patent will expire?” e #F Why orchestra men learn music by heart. Economy—He—Shall I bring candy? She—I'd rather have chewing gum—it’s more durable. Better—Is the tire flat back there? Half—I don’t think so, It’s up all around, except at the very bottom. One—Why do the students take their note-books to military drill? Two—Preparing for a review of course. He—Why are all the girls wearing frocks today? She—It’s a waistless day, silly. Syracuse University ON the Farm—She walked by his side. A simple farm boy he was. And she looked into his eyes, for she too loved the country. They came to a gate. The boy opened the gate and gently they passed through. She could not thank him—for she was but a Jersey cow. Join the Ordnance Corps—Glendora —Did you know I was an ammunition girl? Alphonse—Do you mean you make a lot of noise? Glendora—No, I like to have arms around me. “How are things in Russia now? Is the Caar still reigning?” “Nope. He settled down to a drizzle long ago and now he’s hardly mist.” Prof.—Write a short theme on the subject of baseball. Bright Stude—Rain, no game. “What is the difference between a kiss and a sewing machine?” “One sews seams good. The other seems so good.” “Speaking of bathing in famous springs,” said the tramp to the tourist. “I bathed in the spring of 86.” The pretty manicure, Louise, Has very many beaux; And so she calls them, please, Her manicurios. comicbooks.com