Judge — March 16, 1918 — page 31: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

73rd St.—Broadway—74th St., NEW YORK CITY SUBWAY EXPRESS STATION MAGNIFICENT FIREPROOF HOTEL, CON- Weny cent 1,400 ROOM: SITUATED IN THE VER’ RE OF TOWN. CONVENIENT TO LL SHOPS AND THEATRES. Rooms and Bath, $2.50 per day For 2 Persons, $4.00 per day Canadian Money Is Accepted at This Hotel Without Discount. GEORGE W. SWEENEY, Late of Lafayette Hotel, Buffalo, N. Y. ictoria Hotel, N. Y. The Conscientious Unobjector By Evxice Warp SCAN the chop upon my plate, And think some fighting man may need it; T turn my bit of Sunday ham, And know to Belgium I should feed it. Tlook upon a crusty loaf With pain—some ally must require it; The half-lump in my coffee brings Sad thoughts of all who may desire it. Ah, could we have a warless day, When I might eat, and never question, The things I used to like, without My conscience having indigestion! tap Leslie-Judge Representatives WANTED In Small Towns and Country Districts WE yrant you to help us introduce to the firesides of country homes, The Happy Medium, JUDGE, and the magazine of the happy side of the movies, FILM FUN, and America’s Only Ilustrated News- paper, LESLIE'S WEEKLY. Young men and young wamen (17 to 21) preferred. No experience necessary. We teach and help you to secure subscriptions for three and six months and a year. No Single Copy Sale. Use your spare time evenings, holidays, etc.. and earn from $5 to $25 a week. or put in all of your time during the winter and earn double this amount. Answer quickly so you can start now. Give population and description of town, township or territory you think you can cover. SUB-AGENCY DEPARTMENT LESLIE-JUDGE COMPANY 225 Fifth Avenue New York City Sixes and Sevens By Avsert E. Hoyt ECRETARY McADOO tells Con- gress that he ought to make certain appointments rather than the Presi- dent, because the politicians would bother the President. We wish all sons- in-law were as considerate. ¢ Closing a great many of the churches to save coal is said to have produced that result—at least so.far as this side Jordan is concerned. 2 Carranza sent congratulations on the Kaiser’s birthday, but Wilhelm hasn’t time to reciprocate, because, to para- phrase P. T. Barnum, there’s a Carranza born every minute. 2 Thank goodness, we pay those taxes on our excess earnings—nov yearnings. 2 Colonel Watterson says that “pen work”? won’t win the war. Depends somewhat on whether the output of the pens is roast pork or roast President. 2 Critics have discovered that the Em- peror of Austria is under his wife’s thumb. Vhose wife’s thumb did they suppose he’d be under? ¢ Will H. Hays, the new Chairman of the Republican National Committee, is 38 years old—just about the right age, in case anything should happen two years hence, to relieve Postmaster General Burleson of distributing the males. + Methuselah lived 969 years, and might have had the nerve to make it an even thousand if the Food Administrator hadn’t warned him that his excessive longevity was depriving the army of much needed calories. @ The Bolsheviki have destroyed all the Russian ikons—perhaps for fear some Russian Garfield would insist on an idol Monday. We Are Under War Conditions F your copy of Jupce reaches” you late, remember that the postal facilities are overtaxed and the mails are often days late. Please do not be too quick to make complaint. We are printing and mailing the paper on time. We cannot speed up the mails. When your paper reaches you, read it care- fully and then put a stamp on it and hand it to your postman, who will startit to the boys “Over There,” who are always eager for good reading. big circulation of course. try, in fact. this overcoat. Cuts the Hurt out of Cuts Disinfects and hastens heal- ing of wounds and abrasions. Vaseline S.Pat.or. Carbolated PETROLEUMVELLY Sold in metal-capped glass bottles and sanitary tin tubes at drug and department stores everywhere. Illustrated ‘Vaseline’ Booklet free on request. CHESEBROUGH MFG. CO. lidated) New York City 35 State Street St. Peter—So you were a newspaper editor— Aprticant—No—small—smallest in the coun- St. Peter—Go in and pick out your harp. A Personal Question Hewitt—This is the second year for Jewett—Who had it last year? Itching Rashes —— Soothed With Cuticura comicbooks.com