Judge — February 23, 1918 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

People You Have Known By H.W. Dee E hesitate to speak of Percy Nice, for he is such a dear, harmless friend to everybody. And then he is so sleek and plump, and his hands and feet are such dainty things. He is always so well groomed that we are sometimes almost ex- asperated, and he smiles so sweetly that we find ourselves hunting for ladylike*haughty words to say. Just what Percy does for a livelihood, nobody knows. He must do something, for he keeps himself and the buxom. red-haired wife in good flesh and more than a fashionable amount of clothing. But we never see him doing anything but slipping around and gathering up small talk. As we grow to know hen intimately we discover that he is the champion he-gossip of the town. In justice to his unsullied character, though, it must be said that he carries no nasty scandal. Only the trivial sweet-meats of the suspicious mind pass his coral lips. If it could be arranged without too much talk, Percy Nice ought to be made a member of a ladies’-aid society. He would be a perfect dear as manager of an Easter bazaar, or a rummage sale. How cherubically he would beam at the candy booth, or the stork booth! We are sure that he has a future before him if he could only get himself translated into his natural habitat. If it were not for Percy, we should have to spend all of our time thinking about things worth while. That is one excuse for letting him live. Pasren 00 Yaris Wirey—I’ve been trying all day to get some heat out of our Janitor. Hussy him an Ora! Did you try calling seman? A Prize Winner Described and Pictured By E. W. Kenpre HAMPION CHEESE HOUND, Limburger de Phew, winner of seven- teen blue ribbons and twenty he- cups. This dog has a wonderful scent and can be located, day or night, at a distance of one mile with the naked nose. He is a splendid hunting dog; the owner never has to hunt for him; a few loud sniffs at short intervals brings him to you. His coming down the wind is noiseless and rapid. He clings to you until you change your clothes. He is the sire of four famous prize winners, Brie, Roquefort, Gueyere, and Swiss de Phew. He is also a great rabbit dog, Welsh “Rabbits” being his specialty. With the aid of a piece of dry toast he will run down several well-seasoned bucks in an hour’s time. He is an out-door dog, never being permitted in the house until the occupants have taken to the woods. Gentle and mel- low in his clinging affections, he ripens with age. In warm weather he is inclined to get soft and run during the day, but at night he cools off and spreads himself over any convenient surface. He seldom strays from home, preferring to remain within easy smell of the front porch. His present owner paid ten dollars cash for him, but will sell him for thirty scents, as he contemplates renting a small city apartment. Gumless stamps taken in exchange just as you chews. Sidestepping Hoover Brown (meeting Robinson at the club)— How does it happen that you are dining at the club three ights a week right along now? Robinson—Merely a coincidence, that’s all. Those are the nights we have Food Conservation dinners at home, comicbooks.com