Judge — February 2, 1918 — page 28: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

the midst of the Gulf Stream, with lying fishes Tie: days of restful voyaging and qa are in darting about the ship. The warmth of Spring is borne to you from the south. Two days more and the gleaming shores and palm- clothed hills of Porto Rico welcome you to a land of perpetual summer. You enter a world that is unique—a fascinating combination of the romance and colorful life of old Spain with the conveniences of today. Each picturesque harbor holds a new surprise, each moss-grey fortress stirs your imagin- ation to new heights. 16-DAY CRUISE ALL EXPENSES 942 AND UP You make the voyage in a luxurious 10,000-ton steamer, using the vessel as your hotel for the entire trip from New York to and around Porto Rico, stopping at principal ports and return. All neces- sary expenses included in the fare. Splendid state- room accommodations and cuisine. Write for booklet—"Through Tropic Seas.” Address Passenger Department PORTO RICO LINE 11 BROADWAY NEW YORK Their Monickers L, yes,” confessed Mr. of Rumpus Ridge, Ark. “I reckon you might consider that some of my children have got middlin’ peculiar names. Bearcat and 's se what you can do with Ut tors The Landon School 3 iivetzatine te MB} Schofeld Building, Cleveland. O: Blister and Lilli Bragg and Rowdy sound sorter quaint to you, prob'ly thing, they ain’t liable to be mis sleeping cars. Yaw-haw! haw!" Tom P. Morgan. nd Hieronymus and Braxton and Clessaphine, and so on, But, one aken for Succes d'Estime He—Is Marie’s second venture a success? She—Why, yes—in a way. She praises her first husband, now, and her second husband thinks she’d praise him if she should marry again. JUDGE The Notion. Counter By Dovetas Mattocn. OME women are constant some are constant widows. There seem to be a lot of German ambassadors out of work. A girl may look warm in wool, but she doesn’t look well. Paying taxation without misrepresentation is exceptional. The Hudson Tunnel is not the only big bore in New York. Nothing seems to make a German as cross as a Red Cross. General Byng will soon Byngin’ on the Rhine. Here is where we get even for a lot of Wagner music. Bus scandals. A uniform doesn’t have to fit to look well on you. The preacher was right, but the audience left. A pessimist is the submarine of fellowship The sun is generally up before the daughter. Don’t listen to Red Cross yarns—knit them. A captain is known by the company’ he keeps. Riches have wings, and the rich fly high. The service flag is a “serve us” flag. The German idea of humor is killing. The pessimist seldom leads a charge. Make the world save for democracy: I don’t believe that the mortali wives, and be doing some yourself with brown yarns, not yellow than it has been among the British—but I am not so sure about the mortality among the Germans, The streetcar company doesn’t want to take any chances of any of its employes being elec- trocuted. At least that is how I figure why it employs such poor conductors. There is something the matter with a woman who wears white stockings with black shoes and a dark dress, but I leave it to you what it is. When you sce a man reading “Naughty Yarns” or some such magazine as that you hope no woman will ever be unlucky enough to marry him. Personilly I would rather be one of a tock of birds picking up a livin nong the stones than a cow all alone in a clover patch. There are two kinds of people who are gener- ally wrong as to what constitutes good litera- ture—non-literary people, and literary. We could stand some people better if they didn’t seem to be so sorry for us because we are not like they are. Some people who think they would know how to act in an emergency don’t even know how to act ina \g-car. There is a lot of luck in life if a man will spend fourteen to sixteen hours a day looking for it. I wish women realized that the highest paid actresses in the world are in the speechless drama. Sleep is a good thing to kill time during tra and especially during a travel lecture. The man who leaves everything to the last minute won't leave very much to his widow. el. Fet t sig m thi yo wo act comicbooks.com