Judge — December 15, 1917 — page 26: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Christmas happy NewYear Passing the Mustard] Leveled—‘‘She married a diamond in thy rough, I’m told. “Yes. It was a most unfortunate my. riage.” “How so?” “She lost her own polish trying to gr him one."—Birmingham Age-Herald, Just So—‘Incarcerating offenders is th wrong idea. We ought to try to preveg crime.” “Just so,” said the old-fashioned Judge J “And you can prevent lots of crime by pet, ting the right people in jail.”—Kansas Ciy Journal. The Pessimist—‘When’s the bloomiy’ war goin’ to end?” “Dunno. We've planted some daffy. dils in front of our trench.” 3 You prob- Not Proud of It boast of a common cou We one, stranger, if that’s mean,” 1 the native of Plunkville. “ we don’t boast of it.""—Detroit Free Press, A Thrill of Satisfaction—* Gasoline is likely to be even more expensive, they say.” “Yes,” replied Mr. Chug, Every time my motor won't cun I feel a thrill of satisfaction at the way I am economizing.”— Washington Star. The Judge Gift-Card number of friends whom you would like to remember with some less expensive but characteristic gift. ROR | 1-8 1 & A ‘oe 4 ‘ For a person who has a sense of humor and likes good pictures we suggest a gift-subscription to Language Unnecessary — Summy How do you manage to get on so well wit the French girls when you can’t speak the lingo? Jackie—You're dead slow. Can't ye kiss a girl without a dictionary?—Browning’s Magazine. BES easy The Stunt-Giver—* Did your wife scold when you came home so late last night?” “You don’t know what it is to have a wife who was once a school-teacher. She simply f made me write a hundred time slat ‘I must be at home by 10 o’cloc| York Globe. The Happy Medium Long after the holly and the mistletoe have disap- peared, Judge will come each week a fresh reminder of the giver. oo = Waiting for the Worst —Madge—Poo } Helen! Has the worst been told? Grace—I think not. We are waiting for your version.—Boston Transcript. For $1.00 cach we will send Jiqige for three months to the persons you indicate, together with a tasteful card bearing the on’s greeting and the message that Judge is coming as a gift from you. Fill out the coupon and send it in. “Ke ianola, or for the culin- ary department?” ville Couricr-Jow- nal. eRe re “And don’t forget to i i i a ids ——--——-4 I Judge, 225 Fifth Avenue, New York City | Enclosed is Please send Judge for three months to Evidence—‘‘Is he honest?” } “T think he m e. [haven't heard him bragging about it.”"—Detroit Free Press. OP RS Hs GF fr GF ef The Other One—* Chauncey said that I was the only girl he had ever loved.” “Doesn't h it beautifully, dear?” Jack o° Lantern. fea Sy re What Should They Care—IVife- The paper says that nitrates are higher. Hub—What do we care? We_ never telegraph anywhere.—Chicago Herald. comicbooks.com