Judge — May 19, 1917 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A Great Mistake T IS a great mistake for young people to go as far as to say, “T take thee,” if they are doing so in expectation of passing into a state commonly called wedded bliss. There is no such organism. Wedded bliss is a myth and a mockery. Bliss is beyond the grave—or there is no bliss. The only people who think they know anything about bliss are the people who are blindly looking forward to it—dainty, dreamy Rosalinds with languid eyes, willingly misled Orlandos, -who gladly close their ears to the warnings of the god of things as they usually turn out. Those of us who have lingered long in the thick of wedded bliss have eyes that are alert and earsthat are not far behind. We have opinions about bliss that do not at all accord with the views of Noah Webster. No, child, married life isn’t bliss. It is only a little more complicated kind of existence that calls for more common- sense and less self-insistence than single blessedness ordin- narily inculcates. It is all right to look forward to married life as bliss if you understand that you are doing it just for the fun that you get out of the anticipation. But don’t expect it to pan out big. Bliss is only a will-o’-the-wisp that leads you into places where you will have to use all your energy and your sense to keep afloat. On Top has reached the pinnacle of appreciation in its field. It enjoys the largest circulation in humorous journalism There is always a reason for success. For years JUDGE has consistently addressed the public with a joyous message. It has had a mission. This phrase usually means something of serious import or suggestion. But His Honor’s mission has been to spread good nature—to dispel gloom and replace it with happiness—to act as a foil for the more serious functions of life—to start smiles where undue solemnity might strike in ot always in the lighter manner has good nature been pro- moted under JupGe’s purpose. We have at times punctured pre- tense by satire and guided aright impulses misdirected by many of the “isms” that afflict. ma kind. JupcE has won its success be- cause it has in all respects lived up to its motto, “The Happy Medi- um.” It is distinctive and unique in its field. It has no axes to grind, no perso: animosities to satisfy, no narrow “reforms” to is made festive and hap- ¢ by the impulse and work of artists whose pens and f(D LIKE A Pound oF PRETZELS PLEASE colors are known the world over and by writers whose public is as broad as the land. We are not ed with JupGe, successful as it is. The aim will be to make this magazine constantly better along the lines which the great public has so notably approved. Sixes and Sevens OVERNM ', they say, must now proceed to regulate the use of the air. For a starter, public men might arrange not to use so much of it hot 2 Intending immigrants, under the new literacy test, are re- quired to read the Bible. Why not prepare them to be repre- sentative Americans by showing them the best w: Autumn leaves with it? to press * Moses might have enhanced his popularity by reducing the Ten Commandments to seven. You can't expect a man to break more than one a day. s Daniel in the lion's den was the first authentica of a prophet-sharing project. ted failure ¢ If the food cost predictions are half right, there worthy misprint in the Bible. It ought to read: a sower went forth to soar.” a note- There was Isn't Genegzal Leonard Wood a bit too severe on the Na- tional Guard? You can’t expect mere volunteers to know the whole pharmacopoeia, like a com- manding gencral, or a rear admiral, can you? * Knowing Mr. Taft as we do, knowing the Colonel as we must, and realizing the foresight and sagacity of the Fathers, what gets us is: Why didn’t they provide in the Constitution for a third ex- President to break the tie? 2 Some men are so economical you can tell it by the clothes their wiv wear.—Columbus (Ga.) Enguirer-Sun Husbands may protest at so much decollété—but wives grin and bare it £ With the cost of living what it is, we feel like going on a sympathy strike every time a ship gets docked. 2 The “landed aristocracy” ought to be thankful they landed before the days of the U-boat. comichooksem oe