Judge — April 21, 1917 — page 28: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

DID have such a bully good time at your petit souper, . and especially I en- ; joyed hugely those perfectly delightful tid-bits of news about’ all of our friends. Thanks so much for telling me I can read them every Wednesday morn- ing in The Club-Fellow @ WASHINGTON MIRROR For sale at all the best stands “15 cts. a copy $5.00 a year ONE MADISON AVENUE NEW YORK CITY C.H. EVANS & SONS Hudson, N.Y. UAL KNOWLEDGE A $2 BOOK FOR ONLY $ tbustrates. tn ARKER' HAIR BALSAM A toilet preparation of merit. aref, Passing e Mustard Mortified—‘'I never was so mortified in What's the matter now?” “You know that little gown I bought for $16.50 that looked as though it must have our times that and was so becoming to T never dreamed any one would guess its price or where I bought it.” “Well, did any one?” Yes. I wore it for the first time last night at a dinner dance, and there were just 16 other women there with gowns exactly like it.""—Detroit Free Press. Trying to Please—He had opened up a fishshop, and he ordered a new. sign painted, of which he was very proud. It read, “Fresh Fish Sold Here. What did you put the word ‘fresh’ in for?” said his first customer. ‘You wouldn’t sell them if they weren't fresh, would you?” He painted out the word, leaving just, “Fish Sold Here.” “Why do you say ‘here’?” asked his second customer. You're not selling them where else, are you?” o he rubbed out the word “here “Why use ‘Sold’?” asked the next cus- tomer. “You're not giving them away, are you?” ‘0 he rubbed out everything but the word “Fish,” remarking: “Well, nobody sign now, anywa A moment later another customer came in. “T don’t se up there,” them a mile away, an find fault with that the use of that sign ‘Fish’ when you can smell t- Bits. Pauline at School—After her third day’s attendance at school, Pauline was relating at home stories of her classmates’ naughtiness. “ 'sbad,” commented mamma. “ Did- n’t the teacher have to correct “No,” Pauline assured her. k to all the class but me th afternoon.” “That's queer,” remarked papa, a bit suspicious. “What did she s “She said,” reported Pauline: ‘Now, children, we will all wait till Pauline is in order!'""—Everybody's Magazine. Tart Witness—Dr. Oliver Hobson was defending certain appropriations. “Don’t call these >ropriations pork barrel appropriati he — exclaimed. “Though Pocatella numbers only 517 souls, she can appreciate a $90,000 Post Office as well as any bloated metropolis could. “Cut appropriations of this kind, gentle- men, and you wound your electors as cruelly as the drummer was wounded at the Poca- tella House. “This drummer, being very fond of corn on the cob, ate ear after ear. Finally the pretty waitress, after she’d brought him his 14th or r5th ear, d, tartly: “Don't you think you would save half a dollar or so a day if you boarded at a livery stable?” —IVashington Star. Believed in Preparedness—Mrs. Jen- kins had missed Mrs. Brady from her accustomed haunts, and hearing several “WAR BABIES” ISS and ‘‘Make-Up,” by James Montgomery Flagg, and “WAR BABIES,” by Will Ran- nells, two new Judge covers have been made up into Art Prints, mounted on a heavy mat, 9 x 12, ready for framing. Both pictures are printed in full colors, free of all lettering, exactly as they appeared on the covers of Judge, and they make an attractive decoration for any room Fifty cents brings both the prints, post free, or if desired, either will be sold separately for 25¢ apiece. Kiss and “Make-Up” ort Ai Art Print Department 225 Fifth Ave., New York City Enclosed find Sc (25). Please send me “War Babies.” and Kiss and “Make-Up.” Name Address comicbooks, on