Judge — December 16, 1916 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

(Concluded from second preceding page) grumbled the di “Wasn’t there any at’s all?” appointed Henry. fine skaters there?” “Of course!” affirmed Markowitz. “There was one lady what had on silk pink and white sweater with white fox trimmings, short skoit just the same material like our 789, and a com- bination stovepipe and sailor hat. She was a lovely skater. One of the fellers in uniform was teaching he “Was they all loiners sitive Henry. continued Markowitz, “but you can’t look at the good skaters. They fly too quick. You can only watch the greenhorns what look so frightened and hold on to the railing like they was scasick; they’re having the time of their lif But altogether they’re a sociable crowd by the skating rink; where one goes, they all go; when one stops, they all get to- gether and fall in line.” “Ahal They fall in line!” laughed Henry. Now I sce when you got hoit! You also got interrupted 0 on!” denied Markowitz. “We didn’t skate.” “Didn’t skate!" gasped Hen- ry. “Didn't skate? How is it— how is it you got dizzy?” “From watching them, around and around,” calmly replied Mar- kowitz. “And how did you get hoit?” gesticulated the perplexed bookkeeper. “T slipped down the subway steps, when we was going home,” explained Markowitz. “I tell you, Henry, when weiber want to be stylish, we men got to suffer.” As a Matter of Fact Y WIFE'S cigars are pretty good; I rather like the tie; She bought the shirt I surely would If it had caught my eye; The slippers fit me like a glove; The bathrobe, too, is fine; The socks are splendid, and above The average the wine; ‘The handkerchiefs are dandy, too; There's not a thing amiss — In fact I think I'll have her do My shopping after this. Douglas Malloch, Always Women’s styles may change, but their designs remain always the same. JUST CACKLE Mrs. Gayly —1 read of a hen yesterday that was worth a fabulous amount of money! Jack Golitely—Well, what did she do—marry a chorus-man? Peace and Quiet R the kiddies with their toys, Noisy toys: They're the children of my hostess, dozen girls and boys. And they rattle, bang and clatter In the hall outside my door, And they giggle and they chatter In a never-ending patter, And fall, bumping, on the floor, And they bawl, bawl, bawl, As repeatedly they fall, And T waken with a yawn In the early morning dawn And the tooting, whirring, buzzing of their fiendish patent toys Adds a dozen new varieties of noise, noise, noise, Of noise, noise, noise, noise, noise, noi: Of those bawling, squalling litde girls and boys. half a And those noisy little kiddies In their rompers and their middi Still are hooting, still are tooting Just outside my chamber door; And my promised peace and quiet, Is a mad infernal riot, Of those children of my hostess just outside my chamber door Slamming, banging on the floor, And I come here, nevermore! —Carolyn Wells Blissful Solitude Mrs. Crawford—Did your hus- band object to your going south for the scason? Mrs. Crabshaw—Why. no, dear. He never scems to begrudge the expense of a trip unless I ask him to go along. That Janitor! Shadrach, Meshach and Abedne- It was seven times janitor let it go they cried go explained: heated, but the out between times.